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Recent Blog Posts
I've been dealing with some health issues so it's been a while since I have last posted. SD's latest request made my jaw drop. She wanted to move in our home with her husband and son so that they could save money to keep on travelling. This woman is 37 years old and expects we would provide shelter and food for them. DH flat out told her no and that they needed to work it out themselves. Needless to say they have not gone on any trips recently and we don't see them too often.
It's official. SS14 flunked math for the third quarter. The teacher texted DH a couple of weeks ago to warn him and encourage him to get SS to turn in missing assignments. That prompted DH to reach out to other teachers to ask if there was missing work, etc. Surprise, surprise, there was a long list. DH sat SS down and made him go down the list to do all of it.
Thay helped with some grades. Not with math, because SS told DH he submitted the five assignments -- which he did, but three were blank and two he only did part of it, getting 5/50 in all.
I have been totally disengaged from SD14 for several years now. Not even a simple greeting or eye contact when she is physically present. Shno longer asks for rides, buying things, etc.
SD14 sends me a text out of the blue yesterday. "I left a trash bag on the porch. I'll get it when I come back."
I still had her contact saved in my phone. The last text I saw was 2022. 3 years ago! No happy birthdays, Merry Christmases or anything inbetween. But she randomly texts me about a trash bag???
I posted a little while back about DH, concerns about possible early signs of dementia or ADD, etc. He saw a doctor and was quickly diagnosed with ADD and OCD (the OCD dx surprised me). It was easier for DH to mention ADD to the dr rather than express concerns about dementia, so I don't think that ever came up. It's still a concern. At least he's open to looking at what's going on and doing something about it.
I cannot do this anymore, the frustration, the resentment, trying to force myself to be okay in a blended family when it goes against everything inside me. I'm not cut out to be in a blended family especially when it's someone being in the house full time with a non existent BM but regardless it's my own problem and my own fault, I continued with something and tried to move forward with it and I've had to lay in the own bed I've made.
I’ve really pulled back and disengaged, but some things still get under my skin. One of them is the obligatory “Happy Holidays” or “Happy Birthday” messages. Of course, I don’t have to send them, but guilt creeps in. And if I don’t, you know there will be backlash. It’s happened before in my decade-plus of being a stepmom—the punishment didn’t fit the crime.
My dad is a journal-er. He has been for as long as I can remember. I have forbidden him to dispose of his journal books and Daytimers as I consider them treasures. With the advent of e-mail he has taken to doing a weekly publication of what he refers to as ... The Blurp. Lol.
Despite my desire to fully NGAF (or be ambivalent) about SDiablas comings and goings, I still ruminate about how much they annoy the crap out of me more than I want to. Hopefully getting it all out here and commiserating will help me let it go!
So here's the latest news. OSD29 and YSD27 stay out of the country will soon be coming to an end.
DH relayed to me that OSD will be continuing on her travels alone. Thank-the-heavens! bye bye
BUT YSD27 is coming back to our home town. Why? 2 stupid reasons.
To Girhippoville where Mr. Not So Neutral and his enmeshed adult son, the Mechanic live. Uncle Kinky was always embarrassed of his hometown being too hick and rube. He moved to the "big city" which is really an inner ring suburb of the closest mid-sized city here decades ago before I even knew Chef.
He became frightened of all the smash and grabs/carjackings in his inner ring suburban neighborhood and sold his house mid last November only to buy a plot of land back in the Old Homestead.
SD arrived safe and sound to DH this weekend. DD and I did not go and will not be going for drop off either because of the measles going around and DD being vulnerable since she is just 8 months tomorrow! The good news about DH being solo is that SD was very chatty in the car and giving him answers that we have been long waiting for. So it seems that BM is working as a home health aide which makes more sense on scheduling conflicts we have had with BM on calls for the last couple of months.
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