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The week ended, but the drama goes on

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Submitted by Hastings on Sun, 02/23/2025 - 1:29pm

This was a loooooonnnnng week with SS14. We had winter weather that closed schools from Tuesday afternoon onward, which meant he was here in the house nonstop for days. (Hopefully DH can find something to send him to do this summer.)

He continues to sneak food up to his room, then lie about it. It's particularly annoying because if he'd just ask to have a snack, the answer would be yes. And if he'd obey the rules and show some responsibility, we would let him have food up there.

Physical lashing out, grades, lying, ad nauseum

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Submitted by Hastings on Wed, 02/05/2025 - 10:50am

I blogged over a month ago about SS14 getting suspended for fighting. (He didn't start it, but he escalated it.) I agree with what people have said about defending against bullying, etc., and I agree. But it doesn't sound like that's what was happening.

Yesterday, he got in-school suspension for "horseplay." DH asked him about it. A kid tripped and knocked into SS, and SS responded by shoving him so hard he fell down. SS confirmed that, yes, the kid bumped him by accident.

DH: Then why did you shove him like that?

SS: Because he bumped into me.

Fighting and How to Deal

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Submitted by Hastings on Wed, 12/18/2024 - 10:07pm

SS13 got in a fight at school. This happened a couple of years ago. Apparently (the principal called) a kid walked up to him in the bus line and hit him, so he hit back and teachers broke it up. Both are suspended for two days. Of course, it's our week, which means he's now home with us all day.

DH confronted him about it and SS got angry and said if someone crosses him or upsets him, he'll always fight back. He's been surly and uncommunicative.

Sooo, maybe try saying “no”?

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Submitted by Hastings on Tue, 12/10/2024 - 9:30am

What is it about parents who seem scared of their kids?

As long as I've been around, it's been obvious DH and BM will twist themselves in knots to avoid telling SS13 "no." DH is better about not giving in to SS on everything, but even he avoids the no. They'll discuss trying to steer SS in a certain direction or hiding something from him so he doesn't find out about it. But they never just tell him he can't do or have something.

Holiday break

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Submitted by Hastings on Sat, 11/30/2024 - 9:42am

Well, I had a nice Thanksgiving this year -- alone. It was DH's year to have SS13. Since he wasn't able to take him on a trip earlier this year, he took him on a week-long cruise. I didn't go due to work commitments and difficulties getting a dog sitter, but, honestly, I'm happy this way. I get the house to myself. And I don't have to spend a week sharing a cabin and bathroom with a surly teen boy. Win for me!

“Sick” again — some more

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Submitted by Hastings on Tue, 11/19/2024 - 10:49am

Two weeks ago, SS13 went home from school Wednesday because he "threw up." Was perfectly fine on Thursday (district policy is he couldn't come back the next day). Friday morning, like clockwork, he told BM he threw up, so she kept him home again.

SS has acid reflux and has had it since he was 6. It causes him to spit up sometimes, but not outright vomiting. He also has a prescription, which he hasn't taken in months.

Pay for grades?

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Submitted by Hastings on Sun, 11/17/2024 - 5:20pm

So, today DH found out BM and her parents have been paying SS for grades. She pays him for As and Bs, then they double it. DH says his parents paid him for grades and said maybe we should be doing that and also paying him for any chores. (Chores consist of putting his laundry away and rinsing off dinner dishes. That's it.)

Oh well, what can you do?

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Submitted by Hastings on Sat, 11/09/2024 - 9:13am

So SS13 missed another three days of school this week due to illness. He supposedly threw up at school, so BM picked him up. He had to miss Thursday because the district rule is if you throw up, you can't come back the next day. Friday morning, guess what happened? He got sick again. Apparently spent the day on his PS5 until she made him check assignments. Lounging around, snacking, etc.

SS has acid reflux that causes him to spit up occasionally. He has medication to keep it under control.

DH, who is out of town, asked BM: Has he been taking his medication?

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