So, Ive been here a little while. And while things arent perfect, they have been good for some time now, since I started a wonderful new job, and we are still in the process of buying our house that weve been renting - and good news we are almost there. Just the closing disclosure, and closing documents and we are done.

My issue today is what I THINK is Munchausen by proxy. However it shakes down (sorry for earthquake reference its 30 year anniversary and all over the news here in California) I am concerned for Munchkin SD13.

All this long 5 years and a few months of being with DH, Ive worked to try to figure out all the different ropes of threads of all the different games that Toxic Troll Bm is playing with DH. He might spend 2.5 brain cells on it, which is why I think her games might be effective - he is always in last-minute-respond mode rather than having a plan of any kind. No calculations of moves and counter moves. I give him helpful hints, coach him on the necesity of strong boundaries and how to enforce them.

Ive found myself becoming irritable and on edge. Just to reiterate, SD13 Munchkin and I have a REALLY positive relationship (generally) , but I am becoming more and more guarded around her. I have stopped looking forward to her days with us, and feeling very anxious imagining scenarios that have happened in the past that were high conflict.

Today I realized how much resentment I have inside for Munchkin SD13. I generally love her and we are peas in a pod. But this morning, triggered by something I THOUGHT she did, I just about went off the deep end of the anger chasm. It was one of those weird things. I was in a rush to get out the door, was late, and went to the laundry pile on the couch in our 2 nd living room to get some clothes (yeah, I dont like folding laundry!) I felt around and there was a pile of wet clothes there some mine. I flew into a rage, ran over to Munchkins door, and knocked VERY aggressively.