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i knew it! fh cant live with out mommy

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sorry so long, feel free to skip to the question at the end Smile

it has been a month and we have had no contact with my mil. Ive posted before about how she threatens me and fh to get what she wants, and verbally attacked me and threaten to kick my a**. when my fh put his foot down and said no more, she became best bus with his xw, and now sees ss4 when hes with bm. When my fh found out he told her to loose his number and never call again.

what happens when you have a kid with fh?

smnikki's picture

background: im 27, no kids never married, fh is 30, ss4

Here are some questions.

do things get easier or harder with bm when you have a bio kid?

how do you feel towards your skids after having a bkid?

Do you feel you fh loves your kids as much as skids?

Do you care less about what bm does, or more?

some people mention that they cant wait to have their husband and their house back when skids leave, is this the same for having their their kids father back too?

to ask or not to ask?

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yesterday there was a blog about how do you disengage. I read it and responded, and read the other responses, but i was curious how you might feel in my situation.

my fh does not let my crazy mil or his exw get to him, he will call me and get me all worked up over the latest drama, and then be like oh well they are stupid shi**. it was so hard for me to just drop it after getting upset, that now ive asked him to not tell me unless it effects me. However i still cant help but want to ask every night, was there any drama today?

I think this is beacause of 2 things.

does documenting stuff really matter?

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ever since fh and i started dating we have been documenting things, like:

bm lying about working and sending ss to day care

ss coming back to us sick, EVERYTIME we get him back

ss telling us what bm says about us

ss telling us about bm and her bf drinking

ss telling us he plays in the street at bm

not being behaved at daycare when he stays with bm, hitting, using bad words, lying...
etc...

advice for ss bday?

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Before we had the falling out with my mil, i had planned a huge pirate bday for my ss turning 4. I had a huge pirate ship jumper scheduled, an actor from Disneyland coming as a pirate to entertain the kids, a treasure hunt, invites that were a message in a bottle...etc Well, i canceled it all because we couldnt find another location besides my mil's house to have it. instead we are doing something with just us and him...

anyways, i have know that bm was planning on having a pirate party for ss as soon as he told her i daddy and i were having one.

funny, crazy, psycho wedding drama?

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so my fiance and i are getting married in july and it seemes that drama with his mom and exw have just been getting even more insane. lucky for me, my fh wanted our wedding to be about our love for one another and nothing else so he pushed me to go to jamaica to get married...best idea ever, i realize now!! his ex is now saying stuff like hes a horrible father for not having ss there (she wont let us take him to jamaica) and all kinds of other stuff.

cs issues

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yesterday, my fh exw said that she thinks her son is unhappy when he stays with us and that i am pushing everyone out of his life including his son. She said that he really needed both parents. but, in the next sentence she was so kind to offer(yeah right) that she would take 70% custody of him with out going to court for child support, and that we can have him on the weekends. Then began bashing fh and i, which is when he told her to get and her car and leave. (she showed up un announced at his work) so here are my questions and issues:

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