Rags's Blog
Yes, it often happens that a truly inept parent retains custody or visitation even with impeccable witnesses against them.
In a now deleted thread asking if a custody or visitation can be stopped due to a person be a poor parent it was asked if teachers, school officials and other impeccable witnesses condemn the individual as a poor parent. In my research and direct experience it takes a truly incredible chain of events and heinous behavior by a parent to take custody or visitation away. To the detriment of the child. IMHO.
The answer is often yes, it is extremely difficult to take custody or visitation even from a truly bad parent.
Is it just me or is it getting crazy busy around our "little" community?
I am going to have to quit my job and get divorced just to keep up with my STalk surfing! 
A few short months ago I could reasonably skim each and every post in each and every recently active thread every day. That is not happenin these days.
I have to participate in a limited number of threads until they burn out. As one burns out I add one but I can't keep up with them all.
Any recommendations on how I can improve my surfing efficiency?
One of my senior employees missed work on Monday. At the CourtHouse filing to end CS.
He came to work yesterday on a cloud. He said that he was the only person at the courthouse walking around with a smile on his face. He has four children. Two from his first marriage (21 and 18) and two with his current Wife.
He came to my office and just sat there with a big ol grin on his face, turned to me and said. "17 years $130,000 and I just got a $600/mo raise". "My XW is going to freak out. I am not calling to tell her, the CSE will send her a letter".
The Wife is a bit frustrated with me .... "The kid is home and you are letting everyone know that YOU are in charge"
Wow,
Interesting how a Skid can rain on what is usually a fairly steady state of marital bliss.
My perspective is that it is not about me, it is about him.
He stinks so I tell him to shower. When he is in the shower for less than 5 minutes I send him back to do it again, and again and again until I am confident he did it right.
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad! 47 years is a notable milestone. Thanks for the example, love and support. Of course the 45yrs that I have been around have been pure perfection........... Right????? Love (Your Son)
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From the heights of pride to the lows of disappointment in less than 24 hours.
On the relative scale of stupid Skid behavior this is not all that bad but it did bring tears of disappointment to my Wife's eyes.
I was on my way home from work last evening when my wife called my cell to see if I was on my way and to ask what I wanted to do for dinner. I told her that since it was the Skids first full day home that they could decide and I would be there to pick them up in about a half an hour. I also asked if the Skid was showered and presentable.
The SKid comes home tomorrow. He has had a great year and we could not be
more proud of him.
Recap: Skid is a well behaved, sensitive, introvert who historically under-performs significantly against his capabilities.
In his 15+yr Blended Family career he has learned to be a pleaser and a blender. The problem is that this drives the Rags 1/3 of his family nuts including his Mom and I. We want him to experience his full potential and his life to the fullest.
PA State Rep proposes that Welfare and CS not allowed to be used for alcohol purchases.
I am hugely supportive of this. In fact I think it should be expanded to limit Welfare and CS to staple items including only food, rent, utilities, clothing.
No liquor, beer, soft drinks, candy, etc......
Any thoughts?
Does anyone use a Police station as the pickup/dropoff point for visitation?
A member of another step community that I belong to has an XH that is a substance abuser and posted a question on how to deal with visitation when the NCP is an addict/alcoholic.
Her original post and my response are included in this post.
Any thoughts? .......
Had a bit of a tiff with my wife last night. She made a financial investment without discussing it with me.
This is not specifically a Sparent or Blended family issue but I was curious to hear other perspectives.
The decision was sound. The problem is that she did it without discussing it with me first.
All of our assets are joint and we have always collaborated on those decisions. All in all it was not a huge deal other than she got angry with me when I expressed shock that she had made the decision without calling me to discuss it.