Dontfeedthetrolls's Blog
BM’s Engaged
She called yesterday to tell the kids and SO. We’ve met the guy a handful of times and he seems nice.
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Backwards writing
I’ve noticed that when SO’s youngest writes he does a lot of it backwards. Not just typical letters but also numbers. I’m not extremely worried because he’s only going in first this coming year but I just wanted to ask others who might have kids around the same grade if they’ve seen this kind of thing. He will also get B’s and D’s mixed up when reading but again it doesn’t seem that odd.
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Sharing interest.
I want to share something positive. One of the best things about being a bonus mom (not married yet) is that the kids are picking up some of my interest.
I’ve had people say they look like me which is nice but means very little. What really makes me happy is when they do something that I know came from me. Like the oldest loves some of the same books I loved. I’m the one who introduced her to them and now she has posters and toys and wants new bedding.
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BM has spoken
Well BM finally decided to try and set dates for her midsummer visit. I say try because SO told he no. She sent a message in our group text stating her new guy would be picking up the children next Monday and we could get them back Wednesday after 5.
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Do you want a cat?
Well BM FINALLY made contact. She hasn’t seen or spoken to the kids in three weeks. I’ve sent her a few messages with pictures of the kids at their request but she doesn’t respond. I’ll be honest I was a little worried something might have happened. Anyways she finally messaged us.
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Bathroom safety
SO, myself, the kids, and one other family member went out the other day and had to stop by his work. While there the youngest and the family member needed to go to the bathroom so they went. Since he’s a boy he went into the men’s and she went into the women’s. He’s entering first grade this year and he’s mature enough to go to the bathroom on his own.
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Summer and BM's awol.
So it’s summer finally. Kids got out Thursday last week and as normal BM started messaging about SO getting them early. He was supposed to pick up Friday but agreed to get them from school. As usual BM is MIA already. BM isn’t responding to messages and forget about her calling the kids. She hasn’t even set dates for her mid break visit. It’s frustrating because the youngest is already asking when they go back and we have no answer for him. I’m expecting us to have them most of the summer which isn’t an issue except again we don’t know what to tell the little one when he asks about mom.
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"It's not fair to them" - BM wants to change vistiation dates.
Once again I’m seeing that any time there’s going to be conflict BM goes straight to SO and completely locks me out. Given I’m glad I don’t have to deal with it directly but we’ve been using a group text for months now. EVERYTHING goes through it except when she wants to fight or try to manipulate SO.
I gave SO an ultimatum of sorts.
I HATE that we’re at this point and I don’t do this sort of thing lightly but something’s got to give. I messaged the VSO trying to help us with SO’s VA claim. What he’s told me is that she was trying to get the records so we can fix the DD214. Without it being fixed we’re stuck. Well she didn’t message me back so Friday I sat down with SO.
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9 extra days
So the kids are out of school Friday mid-day to start their Christmas Vacation. This year SO is supposed to have the first part of the vacation, about a week, with BM picking them up Christmas afternoon and then having them till the day before school starts back, just shy of 2 weeks. She works weekends so we already offered to keep them during that time as we have been. Instead she will pick them up LATE Christmas and wants him to pick them back up early Friday morning and keep them the rest of the vacation. So 9 extra days with us.
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