Deja Vu
When SD was a junior/senior in college, DH used to ask her what she was going to do when she graduated. She ended up getting a degree in Creative Writing, with a minor in Photography. SD did not know what she wanted to do, but knew she didn't want to write for a living. DH got her an internship at The Wall Street Journal at the time. Besides waiting tables, that was her sole professional experience before she graduated from college. He would offer suggestions, and she would ignore them. She waited tables for 2 years before deciding to go to grad school on BM's dime. She just finished one year, and now DH is asking her again what she is going to do when she graduates. She doesn't know. He works for a bank now, and the other day he offered to find her a job at the bank. She said as long as she's not a teller (it's not a retail bank anyway) that she would think about it.
Ugh. It's been kind of nice with her living on the other side of the country. It feels like deja vu with DH and SD. If she moves back here, she'll most likely move in with BM again, and that's always drama.
Is SD25 marketable with a Master's Degree in Communications??? I can't help but have a bad feeling if DH were to get her a job at his company.
I'm grateful that at least she's not a "bad" person, but she seems to always be associated with drama. Fighting with BM, getting arrested for domestic violence, always partying, and wanting to live beyond her means.
If a Masters in Communications can get her a decent job, I don't see her wanting to move back to a state where recreational use marijuana is not legal. But hey, at least she has a 4.0 in school!!
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*fingers crossed* that SD has
*fingers crossed* that SD has good luck finding a job...preferably not at DH's company!
I have a master's in
I have a master's in communication. I have a 6-figure job. Nobody would say that what I do is a typical communications job, but I have built a career on good communication skills.
I had no idea what I wanted to do either. But the one thing that was not open to me was freeloading off of my parents. They made it clear that they loved me, and I was responsible for myself. Ate plenty of ramen, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
Will freeloading off BM keep
Will freeloading off BM keep her back? I think so, but I will be very happy for her if she finally breaks through and launches.
Not long ago she was saying how happy she was when she was able to renew her lease for her apartment for another year, and one person commented that her mother pays her bills, so why is it such a big deal. SD deleted that quickly.
Yes she can work in a
Yes she can work in a corporation in their communications department (used to be called PR) or at an agency or even with a senator or congressperson. Not sure you need a masters for it, but with her undergraduate in creative writing, she can totally write press releases (that is a joke). Joking aside, the 3 degrees (I incuded the minor) should lead to a good position, especially in social media/internet communications. She just needs some drive to go get the jobs. Starting salaries are not awesome- high 30s-low 40s.
I think your last line will
I think your last line will be the issue. We've told her many times that she can't just walk into a job, expecting an immediate high salary. It will be interesting to see if she has learned anything in the last 2 years and is willing to start with a lower paying job to gain the experience needed to get ahead. She waited tables because she said she earned more money than other jobs she could have gotten.
That is my exact concern. I
That is my exact concern. I wouldn't want her to reflect negatively on him.
She moved to Colorado in order to more freely use marijuana, so it will be interesting to see if it's enough to keep her out there.
Her age will also make things interesting next year because she is currently on DH's insurance. I'm willing to place a bet that BM will pay for her health insurance when she is no longer eligible for DH's. She's so opposite what I was at her age. I was in college full-time and at 21 started working at a large company at the same time. When they offered health insurance, I took myself off my parents' plan since I would need to once I graduated anyway. I figured it was easy to do it as soon as they offered, and I felt "more like an adult" doing that for myself. I really have to wonder why young people don't seem eager to help themselves.
My cousin had a
My cousin had a Communications Degree. He's now a pharmacist. Turns out he wasn't too fond of the idea of carrying the camera for two years as he worked his way up at a news station.
SD25 doesn't like the idea of
SD25 doesn't like the idea of "working her way up". At least she didn't 2 years ago. It will be interesting to see if she is willing to now.
She originally chose this degree so she can get a job marketing recreational marijuana. I rather hope she is against the odds (in my opinion with what I know of her) and successful in this.
A communications degree could
A communications degree could serve her well in doing a job - but it will not necessarily get her a job. I was with a bunch of new grads from a top notch university a couple of years ago. When I asked their majors - virtually all said "something and communications".
Communications is a very popular degree. There are a zillion young grads with communications degrees - and even masters degrees in communications. A degree in communications prepares one better for the job market than say one in Spanish Literature - but it does not automatically open doors.
So her lack of job experience
So her lack of job experience besides waiting tables will still be an issue? She seems to be very short-sighted when it comes to work. I really have to wonder what she intends to do since she still has no real experience to offer an employer, and she doesn't like the pay for entry level positions. She was a life-guard, she waited tables, and now she's a tutor. She started the graduate program hoping to work for a company marketing recreational use marijuana. Maybe she's got some connections from the places she buys it. Will be interesting...
It's almost always hard to
It's almost always hard to get your foot in the door. When one is an entry level employee one should expect entry level wages.
When I had to redirect my career at 40 because of a crash in my industry I had to take an entry level position. I literally made 1/3 of my previous salary. But I fairly quickly worked my way back up.
I'm convinced that I could go to work at Walmart as a greeter and be able to advance to a good job.
I think it is all about the
I think it is all about the internships/jobs that define the path with this type of degree. It doesn't sound like she is aggressively pursuing work in her field.
I know two girls who graduated the same year with a degree in journalism. One did some kind of field related work from the summer after her freshman year until she graduated. She had a grueling schedule but at 16 or so, she is now on TV in a mid sized market.
The other one did one internship summer before senior year. She works in an accounting firm doing administrative work. She just never prioritized her time well -- sorority was important, don't you know.
That was my SD. The only
That was my SD. The only time DH put his foot down was when he refused to pay her sorority dues/fees. The funny thing about the one internship SD had, was that it was only 2 weeks long. And she didn't even try to keep any connections she made.
I'm very lucky for three
I'm very lucky for three reasons.
1) I have a relatively small house, so there isn't any room for her. DH wants to finish the basement, but that is so low on our list of priorities, so there is no place private SD can stay.
2) There is such an age difference between SD and my children that her lifestyle would not fit into our household. She would completely disturb my young kids if she tried coming and going at the hours she likes to keep.
3) There has been enough drama between SD and BM when she lived with BM that DH is scared to let her in our house beyond a day visit. BM kicked SD out a few times, and SD would call the police on BM and threatened to take BM to court. Of course BM would take SD back every time. DH is convinced that if we were to let her in our house overnight, she would refuse to leave and cause drama, and he does not want any of that. I just have to hope that DH remembers all those incidents next year when she graduates!
Hmmmm. My thoughts are if
Hmmmm. My thoughts are if mommy keeps paying her bills and daddy keeps getting her jobs she will not be motivated to launch an independent life. Both parents need to back off IMHO. She needs to experience success and failure without outside influence.
I completely agree. DH
I completely agree. DH usually says things like that, so I don't know why he'd go and offer something like this again. He grumbles that nobody ever got him a job, and he knows how immature SD25 is, so why would he do it now? She's had plenty of chances; it's now time for her to really grow up and can't do it unless she's left to sink or swim on her own.