I am seriously at my wit's end with this ridiculous situation between DH and SS16. DH has no problem yelling at SS- he just refuses to punish him, and this week it has escalated to a point where my lady bits dried up at DH's inability to give consequences to a 16YO, and watching SS continually get away with bending/breaking rules. It ruined the entire week and caused so many disagreements. 

SS is late? DH gives more chances. SS doesn't turn in assignments? No consequences, even though he's supposed to lose video game cords. SS's gf's mom stopped at our house on Sat and had a drink with us- she's very nice and was saying how she has rules for her kids, and she can be strict...DH said, "I need to remember that it's ok to be strict and enforce rules". For real DH- Enough being a wet noodle!

Also, SS has constant issues with his car, and calls DH every time, no matter if DH is at work. I get that to a point- Dads fix cars. But he had a leak in his tire and works at a store that sells Fix-A-flat....so rather than instruct SS on how to do it (idk, maybe read the directions?) he has SS come to his work and goes outside to put the Fix-A-Flat in for SS. 2 days later they go to buy new tires and DH and I were discussing who was paying for said tires. DH has been constantly yelling at SS that he needs to work and save $. Instead, SS has found ways to call into work, get out of work, and spent all of his $ going out with his gf. So he has almost no $, even though one of his jobs pays $22/hr. DH yelling at him does absolutely nothing. I said I think SS should have to pay for something for his car- DH has paid for EVERYTHING. Crazy has not paid one cent, and neither DH or SS have asked her. I said, SS just asks you for $ because he knows you will pay for it. Which is BS, because you already pay child support- he can ask her for $ too. DH said "well, she always says she will pay but then doesn't". I said, Crazy is the biggest coddler we know- if she isn't giving him $, maybe you shouldn't either! I have not asked if DH paid for the tires because I know I will be annoyed with the answer. DH has been complaining about how much we have to pay for and how we need $ for this and that, so when there are options of asking Crazy or having SS pay also, yes, that should be done. We have separate finances, but then I don't want to hear DH complain. 

Meanwhile, SD13 threw a mini-tantrum at DH on Sat when he made her come out of her room and come outside by us. She has told DH and her counselor that she doesn't want to be in her room so much, and DH should make her come out. So he did. And she pouted in a chair. When he asked what her problem was, she had an attitude and said she wanted to be in her room (laying on her bed. Where she had been for 5 hours already) on Tik Tok. Then she went on to say how he doesn't yell at SS for this stuff, how he never punishes SS, (true- yet another reason I told DH he needs to actually give SS consequences). She basically was comparing DH's way of parenting to Crazy's, saying DH is bad at this and that and she really just thinks Crazy's lack of parenting is better. Lots of backtalk. SD wanted to be allowed to sit on the roof outside of her room. SD has made repeated suicidal statements, which we take seriously and Crazy finally has too (kind of). After hearing SD continuing to whine about wanting to sit on the roof I said, Do you really think we're going to let the girl who has made suicidal statements sit on a roof?? Do you know what kind of messages we would get from your mom?? The cops would probably show up in minutes!. She said "I'm not going to jump" and continued to whine and argue with DH. I got up and went inside because I couldn't listen to it anymore, and DH was yelling at her and threatening to take her phone if she kept it up. We had been having a great time outside, and she had already ruined that. She finally just went to her room, and she has refused to talk to DH ever since. He has tried and she refuses so he stopped trying. She has been polite but short to me. Fine. I told DH I will not be surprised if she asks to stay by Crazy the majority of the time soon. She is so brainwashed and convinced DH is the bad parent and Crazy is just crushing it as a mom. 

I have avoided both skids like the plague ever since. I am done. They leave today, but of course SS always leaves his crap here and comes back after school to get it, no matter how many times he's told to take it by Crazy before school, because SS does what he wants. Currently his clothes are in the dryer, because he insists on doing laundry on Sun. nights when there's a good chance he won't take them out before he goes by Crazy, and then I will have to do it in order to do my own laundry. (Note: There will be a new rule in place next time they come- no laundry on Sunday nights). 

Skids come back to us on Sat already (2 days early) since DH insisted on switching the days we will be gone for our trip with Crazy, and I do not even know how I'm going to make it. I am holding onto a tiny bit of hope that DH may change his approach with SS after the hell I gave him this week and how frustrated he got, but Idk. I cannot seem to disengage this, especially when I'm the adult with them sometimes when DH works. DH just needs to put his big girl panties on and Parent his GD son for once. 

End rant.