My 2 year old has better table manners than my 9 and 10 yr old skids. The skids talk with food in their mouths, chew with their mouth open, eat with their hands, spill food everywhere, pick up the plates and literally push the food into their mouth off the sides, eat with their faces two inches from the bowl.

I tried for years to get them to stop. Now I just don't eat with them, and I don't let BS eat with them either. I eat in the living room after they are done, and BS eat at a little toddler table in the living room. I won't have them influencing him negatively.

The only time I address it now is if I can hear them chewing from the other room, or if we are eating out and I have to look at it.

yeah. i hate dinner as well. ss6 eats with his mouth open, especially if he doesn't like what he's eating, which is almost always. he cries. he makes faces. he takes two hours to finish about four ounces of food while sighing and making puppy dog eyes at everyone in the room. sometimes he throws a full on crying fit and DH has to send him to time out.

they also find every possible reason to interrupt everyone else eating. they need water three times (since they take 2 hours to eat). they need a napkin. they need more salt. whenever the skids are here, i basically just pretend i am eating by myself because DH is constantly getting up and leaving the table to get something for the skids. his food is usually cold by the time he starts really eating.

The disgusting table manners is why I prefer to eat at the kitchen counter. At least then, I can sit at the end furthest from SS14. When we sit at the table, I've got a front row view of the atrocities!

Poor grammar and lack of table manners scream ignorance and poor upbringing. I sometimes think I should have little cards printed up that say, "My apologies. I did not raise them." I could hand them out each time I'm humiliated by their behavior.

Not alone at all. After FDH introduced me to the boys, when I would come over, I tried every excuse to get out of staying for dinner. SS6 was a terribly picky eater, whined about everything and took forever. SS8 chews with his mouth open, smacks, and both kids talk with food in their mouths. SS6 is less picky now and goes a bit faster, but we still have some pretty whiny nights. I still have "conflicts" come up from time to time that necessitate me eating later because some days I just can't handle it.

Sitting properly at the table was and still is a struggle as well. Utensils are hit or miss. It drives FDH even more nuts than me, I think, but he can't escape like I can. Part of the issue (or most of the issue) is that apparently they never actually sat down to a meal like normal people when whatshername was there. She would just put food out on the table (cheese and crackers, fruit, etc) and the kids would come in and "graze" between playing. I think they still do that when they're with her now (we have 50/50).

I think some of their manners are getting better and it's probably got less to do with us harping on them than it does with them having lunch at school with other kids and being at their friends houses. Seeing that other kids don't eat like animals (actually, the dog and the cat are much less obnoxious when they eat) probably makes the point better than us telling them constantly.

I still dread restaurant trips and really do wish I had a t-shirt that says "They are NOT mine."

sd19 did a few things that irritated me. for one, she was always loud. she was constantly talking about inappropriate crap like poop. she would question what i was feeding my infant son and then tell him that what i was giving him was nasty. she would down a few glasses of juice or cans of pop (bd had to choose between water and milk and has the teeth to show for it ) and only eat a few bites of her food and complain that she was stuffed, then be rummaging thru my cupboards 20 mins later. i hated having to feed her at all. }:)