What do you call your stepchildren??
I have been in my stepdaughter's life for 5 years. I have always treated her and loved her as my own. Although I will never be her mother nor want to replace her mother I call her my daughter. I feel as if calling her my "stepdaughter" is an insult to her and to my husband. I feel that I would be saying that I don't think that she is a part of my life and that just because I didn't give birth to her that she is not mine. I think that it is insulting to treat her as differently than our other 2 sons. The mother finds this very insulting to her that I say that she is my daughter to our friends. They know that she is not my "real" child... But I guess I view it differently. Really what is the meaning of biological?? Is it just blood? Is it the pain of birth? I think that some mother's are maybe threatened that we may be a better mother than them. I am really not sure. But I love her and care for her and I REFUSE to treat her any differently in our home. I want her to come to our home and be part of our family and to feel that way.
- trixilox's blog
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I call my SD over here my
I call my SD over here my daughter. I feel the same way that you describe trixilox... because to call her stepdaughter would be insulting and hurtful to her. I am raising her right now.. she lives with her dad and I and her dad is away on business. So most often, I refer to her as my daughter.
I call them my kids. They
I call them my kids. They call ke their parent or their stepmom. I'm fine with either.
call them my kids, it was not
call them my kids, it was not their choice to go through there mother's multiple affairs, the divorce or the non-stop custody battle that never seems to end. My kids are okay with it and the "stepkids" have expressed no concerns. the one's to express the concerns were my husband's parents who wont even put our wedding pictures up along with DF and his ex, and his ex which has expressed that "SUPPOSEDLY" I threatened to kill the kids if they did not call me mom.
I would never want my SD10 to
I would never want my SD10 to call me mom, or anything like mom.... I am NOT her mother. I want to be an important person in her life. Just to help guide her. BUT she will always e a daughter to me and I don't think that is wrong to love and care for her as much as if she was my own. My thoughts are that the BM should be thankful that she has such a wonderful SM to treat her as such. My SM that I had when I was growing up didn't like me much and I always felt like an outsider there. I don't want her to feel that way. I want this to be her home and her family. And that is the way that I will continue to run my home. We didn't have the problem of me treating her that way until we got married. Once we were married everything changed with the BM. It was almost as if that was the final goodbye to her ex and she didn't like that much. Again, mind you she was married and pregnant before we got married. Still just so confused about it. She yelled at us when we wanted a girl saying that I all ready had one and that I should treat SD as my own and now that I said it on FB she is throwing a fit.
You know - I forgot to add -
You know - I forgot to add - I also call my SD "My BRAT!"
When she first came to live with us, and people would ask, is that your daughter? Both of us felt stuck! I knew she was uncomfortable, and I was too.
So I told her I was going to start introducing her as MY BRAT! She loved it! And now, I still call her Brat, Bratzilla, Bratsie - all terms of affection that my father actually used on me too.
What's funny is when I say "yeah, SD is my brat.." A lot of adults for some reason will say back to me "OH No! She's not a brat! She's a really nice young lady!"... and then I have to explain it! SD and I both laugh at that one!
I dont refer to ss as
I dont refer to ss as anything. Eons ago I referred to him as "my son"-I too thought it would hurt his feelings if I referred to him as a ss. Years later I realized that he didnt want to be known as My son-that he had a bm and that it was like me trying to deny that by calling him MINE. I am never with all 3 of mine and ss by myself. So I usually let dh answer on who the kids are. If I do answer, I say, "yes,these are our kids." or "yes, you are right dh and I do have alot of kids between us". -without really specifying who is whose bio parent and what the varoius erlationships are.