"Oh stop making that face, you look just like your FATHER!"

"How dare you say that! Did your FATHER tell you to say that?"

"I love you soooo much, no one could ever love you as much as I do! Do you love me most of all?"

Now imagine the poor little girl listening to these words coming out of her beloved Mother's mouth. Imagine what she is thinking and feeling. You know she can hear the hatred in Mommy's voice. You know she just wants her Mommy to love her no matter what...and she will try her best to behave the way Mommy wants her to behave.

Last Summer during her visit to New Jersey, we took my boyfriend's little girl out to eat. It was one of her favorite restaurants and she had picked it out that evening. But in the middle of the meal she made a face and laughingly, I said "oh you look just like your Daddy!" She gave me a shocked expression and started to cry. It was my turn to be shocked and we all wanted to know what the problem was! "What's wrong? Why are you crying?" She told us shakily, "that's what Mom says all the time but she is angry when she says it." My heart broke in two for this poor little girl.

I went through a rough divorce when my children were very young and I decided from the beginning that I would never put my kids in the middle. Their father came to their school plays, knew about every Christmas concert and we put aside our differences to attend Back to School night together. We were a united front, even if we lived in different houses.

Children just want to love Mommy and Daddy. That's it. That's all. If you don't allow this to happen...you are hurting them and yourself. Please please please don't do this to them! Just let them love their parents equally.