I have had a difficult relationship with my mother all my life. My earliest memories include difficult times with her. We've been cautious of one another for years and things came to a head this June. We won't be having a relationship any longer. My sister, who profusely proclaimed that she refused to be caught in the middle of anything and wouldn't take sides, has done exactly that.

Has anyone successfully managed to live apart from their DH but keep the marriage/relationship strong as a couple? I've been considering it if my DH wants to be spending more time with his daughter and estranged son - if it will make him happy. (Since his son 16 ran away two months ago, DH has been taking it out on me and my DS15 - understandable, but certainly not fun for either of us.)

We own professional businesses in the same town. We used to be partners, but split ten years ago. She had an affair on my dad (step dad, but he's my 'pops') at that time, which was the last straw for me. But she's an undiagnosed BPD, married five times, engaged at least four more times than that, extremely defensive person. So by "last straw" I do mean I finally had enough.

And actually applied to your life?

I've learned I was naive to believe I could love skids as my own. I did not understand that love needs to be reciprocated even with children. Seems obvious now, but...

So now I understand that it's okay, and normal, NOT to care a fig about them if that works for me. It's a relief to set myself free from those chains. I can't talk about that with anyone NOT from here of course, but it's freeing all the same lol.