sammmx's Blog
"Because you can't take my kids away from me" ...
As to why appeasing BM is more important than appeasing me. I'm not a priority. And it sounds like I never will be. It's easier to fight with me than fight with her because when I'm mad, I can't keep the kids from him. I always figured that was the case, but I guess it's confirmed now.
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Not to brag but ...
Having the Skids 2 days a week is such a nice change from having them full time. I feel like the stress in my life has decreased almost in half. When they're not here I don't think about them, we don't talk about them, and same with BM. (It's not the kids that bother me, it's just that seeing them or hearing about them just makes me think of BM who I absolutely detest.) Out of sight out of mind.
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BM/BF crying during pick up and/or drop off?
My newest dilemma. It sickens me, even typing this I shudder. Anyway...
So BM went through a phase of withholding SS3 from BF. I guess after 2 months of being a 'full time mom' (which she has NEVER done before) she has decided she's had enough of that and is allowing BF visitation again.
So the past three times SS3 has been here (one weekend and two days), both BM and my BF have exhibited some strange and to this point, unseen behavior. It grosses me out and angers me and makes me uncomfortable and just generally irks me.
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Things of BM's.
BF and I recently moved into our new house and throughout the move I found ALOT of random things of BM's that kind of bothered me...
- an entire album of pictures of her, him and her son (SS9)
- BM's medical bracelet from when she was in the hospital giving birth to SS3
- old love ltters from BM
- a random picture of her posing in a bikini framed *BARFFFFF*
- clothes and shoes belonging to her
- a video titled "BM's amazing gift <3" [in HER writing.. judging by the DATE I can only assume it's SS3's birth on film.. BARF BARF BARF !!!!]
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Does your DH have contact with BM's family?
So the other day BF was talking to BM2's (the tolerable, non-crazy one) StepFather as he wanted BF to do some work for him (not going into details). I guess throughout the conversation the SF invited BF to his wife's (BM2's mother) birthday party next weekend. They booked a restaurant. BF told the SF he would "have to bring the wife" and apparently SF said it was fine, of course. So now BF wants to go. BM2 would be there and all their family and friends. I said if BF planned on going I would attend as well but I feel like it'd be extremely awkward. I don't know ...
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BM is still on a major power trip & BF might be reaching his limit?
I don't know how well/if any of you follow my blog or are familiar with my story, but to sum it up - we had custody of SS9 and SS3 for the summer because BM was in detox/homeless. Beginning of September she was returned custody and being bitter and blaming us for her loss of the children, she began to withhold them. BF is extremely passive with her and would rather avoid conflict because BM will PAS the Skids against him if he so much as raises an eyebrow at her. So he, to date, has done nothing.
Refusing to deal with BM - immature?
So after all the crap that has gone down the past few months, I have basically refused to deal with BM, do anything that benefits her, etc. No more favours from me. I don't want to see or hear from her for as long as I can help it.
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So he surprised me.
And told BM he could only watch the kids until when I got off work last night. Turns out she only needed a babysitter for 2 hours anyway, just didn't want to have to come back into town twice. I guess he told her that if she wanted him to watch them they had to be gone by 8pm at the latest. And for whatever reason she obliged! I got home, saw the SKids for all of 10min and then they left. BF had them make me little birthday cards, which were pretty cute. As soon as I walked through the door SS3 was like, "Sammmx!
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"Happy" birthday to me... UGH.
So today is my 21st birthday and BF and I had plans to go out for dinner and drinks after work. I was pretty excited about it, you know... but LOW AND BEHOLD BM calls him up and 'needs' BF to take the kids for the night. And since he hasn't got to see them lately he of course says yes. Well... there go our plans. He says we can still go out for dinner with the Skids (in the past NOT a fun experience), but considering SS3 goes to bed at 8pm I would rather just fucking stay at home. Happy fucking birthday to me...
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BM's new card - "I don't like your girlfriend." Uhhh since when?
So like two weeks ago when BM first took the kids and refused to let us see them, I sent her a text message (after maybe one too many glasses of wine) to try and open her eyes a little. That was my first mistake. BM doesn't give a shit about anyone or anything but herself, so therefore everyone but her is in the wrong.