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Explaining stepmommy to SD4?

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Tue, 02/04/2014 - 8:16pm

If anyone can shed some light on the best way to explain my role to SD, it would be greatly appreciated. She is 4 adn I hae pretty much always been in her life. She calls me by my name. We have her more often than not, and I can tell that she is starting to feel conflicted. She will tell me that she loves and then quickly tell me she loves her BM. So I want to explain my role, without using evil disney characters, preferably without stepping on BM's toes, and in a way that makes sense and does not make her feel like I am trying to replace BM....

slightly O/T question for veteran Mom's and step mom's

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Mon, 11/25/2013 - 5:23pm

SD4's preschool teacher is very good with her and makes morning drop off's much easier. Also SD has not been getting into trouble at preschool since she entered that class. The teacher always makes her feel welcome and special when she walks through the door. SO, I would like to get her something from Christmas, nothing extravagant, but still something to show appreciation. My question is, WTF do you get a preschool teacher that you don't really know for Christmas? Gift certificate? Bath set? (she doesn't seem like the bath set type).

rrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 11/22/2013 - 2:45pm

So it's raining... a lot and pretty damn cold outside and BM sends SD to school in..... SANDALS!!! BM has 2 of the 3 pairs of tennis shoes that I had for SD. Also, as far as I can tell she has NOT purchased ANY winter apparel for SD!!!!! AND! she sent SD to school last week wearing a crocheted? sweater (the kind that is bunch of holes and is basically decorative) that she bought her 2 years ago... when she was 2! SD is tall for her age and is currently wearing a size 5.

Step anxiety

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 11/22/2013 - 10:57am

SD4 and I have a pretty good relationship now, although I fear that she is using me as a surrogate mother. She tells her daddy that she likes me better than him and always wants me to tuck her in and she will only hold MY hand when she crosses the street. Previously she was Daddy's girl, always. But now I think she misses her mom so much so is using me as a substitute.

Confused

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Sun, 11/17/2013 - 10:46am

Historically BM wanted me to have nothing to do with SD. But we needed some new family photos, and I decided to have a friend take some of DH, SD, and myself. I was trying to avoid telling BM as I thought it would be a bit of an argument. The day we had to do the shoot, SD was supposed to be with BM, so we asked if we could have her. (I knew that wouldn't be a fight) She asked why we wanted her that day and DH told her.... She asked if we wanted her neighbor to do her hair the way she did it for SD4's bday....???? Sure! She asked if we had an outfit for her and what else we needed...

Halloween....

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Submitted by Onewillfullstepmom on Fri, 11/01/2013 - 2:11am

So we did not have SD for Halloween this year, I wanted to stay home and pass out candy in our new house where there are plenty of kids now.... But alas I had to work. I asked DH to get a pic of SD4 in her costume from BM. He did and sen it to my phone, I was surprised by how it made me feel... It felt like I was missing out on something really important. I know she is not my bio, but I guess when I don't have one, and she is with me more often than not... sometimes I think of her as mine... I felt a little sad not being with her...

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