I’ve had it
SS12 loves our little dachshund mix. Dog only has interest in SS when SS has food. The last three nights in a row, while we're eating (we tend to eat in the living room), when Dog has gotten up on the couch, SS has held onto Dog. Dog doesn't usually struggle much, but he stares across the room at me, constantly. Three times I've had to remind SS not to hug him -- dogs don't like it. Tonight, I noticed SS had his fingers looped in Dog's collar. I called him out on it and Dog immediately ran away from him.
Now SS is sitting over there steaming and tapping angrily on his phone while Dog sleeps next to me.
I get it. He loves Dog. Dog is incredibly cute and the sweetest, gentlest dog ever. Dog also is a huge mama's boy who is closely bonded to me. Probably not easy for SS to deal with. I tried to be nice but firm. I told him I get it. He wants to cuddle Dog. But you have to respect what other living things want. And Dog doesn't like to be restrained. If he treats him the way he wants, Dog may hang out with him more.
Then tonight, the holding and the collar.
He's a damned brick wall who doesn't care about anyone or anything but what he wants.
Lack of respect for boundaries (including physical) could turn into a big problem. Why am I the only one who sees this?
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Comments
You're correct. My 14ss also
You're correct. My 14ss also does this with our cat. He won't take part in any of the cat's care or feeding or treat her like she prefers so he gets whiny and pissed and when she doesn't want anything to do with him. Humans have started to treat him like the cat does and he acts so put out. But he has this expectation that he should be able to treat others however he wants with no negative consequences.
A part of me would hate it to
A part of me would hate it to come to that, but another part of me hopes it does, so he would learn a lesson. But, then, I'm not sure he actually would learn one.
I've seen him playing with other kids before and he tends to go too far -- playing too rough, not listening to other people. Once last year at the neighborhood pool, he was playing with some siblings and, when he wouldn't stop splashing the sister, the brothers told him to go away. He wouldn't, so they got out of the pool and went to the other end. (DH was asleep, I was prepared to wake him, but the kids handled it well.) same day, he was playing with a kid he knew, cheated on a race, and the kid got out and told his dad he was ready to go.
I don't think this stuff is really sinking in. He gets his feelings hurt but doesn't realize he's the problem.
A bully. He is lucky the brothers did not whup his ass.
Too bad they didn't.
Most bullies will not gain clarity until someone busts them in the lip and makes the point.
The sooner the better.
IMHO.
For the dog's sake, I hope SS does not lose part of his face to a dog bite for the crap this kid plies.
Pestering the dog was also
Pestering the dog was also one of my bugbears where the skids were concerned. After training my loving and loveable little shih-tzu/poodle to behave calmly when people approached her food dish (while she was eating), my then teen-aged steps made a game out of tormenting her with a hambone that they offered, then yanked away. Finally, I'd had enough and fed the dog in my bedroom with the door fimly shut.
Aggravating a dog, who is helpless in many ways and must depend on its owners for comfort and support, is a form of cruelty that should never be tolerated. I'm glad to hear, Hastings, that you're enforcing boundaries to protect your little fella'.
Thank you. I have NO
Thank you. I have NO tolerance for cruelty to animals. My husband's previous dog, who died a year ago, was a nasty piece of work. Chihuahua-terrier mix. He didn't like people much and hated petting. But he frequently came to curl up next to me. Why? Because I respected his personal bubble and left him alone. He knew he could relax with me. And I would protect him if anyone tried to mess with him.
SS isn't cruel in an overt way. I've never seen a sign that he's deliberately mean. But he is thoughtless and selfish. He's coming from a place of affection. The problem is, he won't listen or respect what the other living thing wants. It's all about him.
This is why animal cages were
This is why animal cages were created. Stuff the ill-behaved bratlings in them so they can't torture the pets.
Ha! Excellent idea! Pets are
Ha! Excellent idea! Pets are certainly more lovable!
I think there's a youtube
On shock collars for brats. Boy oh boy did Chef's brats ever need those!!! I caught his youngest two ferals, supposedly "animal lovers" kick and shove my cats at the time!
It was all I could do to restrain myself from picking up YSS 6 at the time, by his light orange colored hair.
I'd have called him out on it
I'd have called him out on it too. Critters are helpless at times and deliberately holding them down or taunting them is cruel. Call him out every time.
Oh, I will. Dog can't speak
Oh, I will. Dog can't speak for himself (he doesn't even bark). I speak for him. DH has no tolerance for poor treatment of animals, either. But he tends to be clueless to what's going on around him. What SS is doing isn't obvious, so DH doesn't see it. Thankfully he had no problem with my speaking up, because I don't want to fight that battle, too!
It's subtle. He doesn't look like he's restraining him, but if Dog moves, SS's grip tightens a bit so Dog feels restrained. Anyway, Dog's way of communicating with me is to stare. Ready for dinner? Sit and stare at Mama. Need to go out? Sit by the back door and stare at Mama. When he's on the couch with SS, his eyes never leave me.
Anyway, I'll keep calling him out, even though it's pissing him off. He's known for years I'm the "strict" one. I'm not willing to look the other way where Dog is concerned.