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There's Two Sides to Having a Fulltime Bio & Skid

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Submitted by FMSL on Wed, 02/11/2015 - 1:30pm

Although I know that I could never survive SD12 full-time if it weren't for BD4, there is a huge price to pay. I decided to become a SAHM to SD over 7 years ago. I quit my career (a career that was not easy to earn) and decided to commit myself to DH and SD. Needless to say, it was a horribly rocky start to a new marriage as I was 40 years old at the time. I quickly realized how important it was for me at the time--not everyone would feel this way--but for me at the time, I realized I couldn't make such sacrifices unless DH and I could have our own family.

Is a 12 Year Old Capable of Choosing to Help Around the House??

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Submitted by FMSL on Fri, 02/06/2015 - 1:27pm

The short answer is YES, of course!! I know I had daily chores and on weekends, I got to do extra helpful things like scrub the bathtubs and even mow the lawn. On top of that, if I really wanted something extra like dance lessons or music lessons, my parents told me that I would have to prove I'm responsible enough to take initiative to help out more than usual AND keep my grades up.

Keeping Quiet

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Submitted by FMSL on Mon, 02/02/2015 - 1:04pm

I am so so so so so so tired of not being able to discuss any small simple thing concerning SD12 without DH pitching a fit. I can't say I'm worried about her doing this, or I think she needs that.... I can't warn him of his guilty dad actions. Even as a fulltimer, it's still just none of my business I guess. It just hurts to always have to keep my mouth shut about what goes on in my own house. Internalizing this stress is killing me.

How do you cope with skids only taking and never giving?

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Submitted by FMSL on Thu, 12/04/2014 - 1:46pm

Does anyone else find this step-life extremely difficult in terms of having to give up so many of your own resources in order to take care of someone else's--as in BM's--child? I do it for DH but it is so annoying to have to take all the responsibility for BM when BM dumped SD on us years ago and hasn't done one thing to help raise or support SD. BM just went absent, other than to brag on FB that she's MOTY because she has a picture or two of SD.

At Wits End

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Submitted by FMSL on Sat, 09/27/2014 - 5:00pm

I have NO IDEA why I get so wound up about SD11-soon-to-be-12. I'm a full time SM and every damn thing she does just gets on my nerves. She never speaks in full sentences. Just grunts. One word sentences is all I ever hear from her. She's dirty as hell. Nasty. Leaves sticky grime all over the cupboards, doorknobs, and light switches DAILY. I keep cleaning them. She leaves torn up paper scraps all over the floor. Hair everywhere. Unflushed toilets. Never ends!!!

Fulltimers & Resentment

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Submitted by FMSL on Mon, 09/01/2014 - 2:30pm

Last week I felt like I was going to die of depression. Suddenly I'm feeling resentful. Do any of you full timer SPs, male or female (with ZERO support or visitation from the Bio) ever resent that you have to provide 100% when the kid is completely rude toward you and ungrateful to both you and your spouse? It would be different if my SD actually showed she needed and appreciated what we do for her. BUT, SD is rude and even downright mean to DH and I. We have tried every approach with her. Rewards. Compliments. Punishment. Praise. Help. Support.

One of Those Weeks

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Submitted by FMSL on Wed, 08/27/2014 - 8:12am

It's been one of those weeks already where it seems like everything and everyone around me is there SOLELY to make me miserable and to take from me and just suck me dry. While I benefit all of them, not one person around benefits me.

Weeks like this make me wish I never met & married someone with a kid.

Weeks like this make extra pissed that on one hand, SD11 refuses to say a word to any of us but on the other hand, SD won't stop talking if she needs us to buy her something.

Need to Vent about Morons!

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Submitted by FMSL on Tue, 08/19/2014 - 3:27pm

Full time SM here. BM has been out of entire picture for years now. SD11 is all take and all moody pre-teen hormonal girl. Yeah, I know...it's normal...but...it's not normal for me as the fulltime SM to have to deal with it WITHOUT any real parental authorities!!

Tonight, I make dinner. The entire upstairs of the house is dark. I assume SD is at her friend's house as usual. I serve dinner to DH and BD. An hour later, SD suddenly appears from out of her room and says, "Is my food ready?" I'm completely caught off guard AS ALWAYS.

So Annoying Part 2

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Submitted by FMSL on Wed, 06/18/2014 - 1:27pm

My SDpre-teen is not only lazy, but refuses to even begin to act her age. She wants to remain a toddler and make baby noises and run around like a crazy person. It's so annoying and on top of that, she has zero common sense. She doesn't know to come inside from the rain. Complete moron.

So, when I'm left alone to "babysit" her moronic ass and I get crippled with anxiety, DH is also so dumb he decides to say, "What's wrong with you? I can handle it. Why can't you?" Ha! Really? Maybe it's because SD is a chip off the old Stupid Block...

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