I have three adult skids with families of their own. We have four beautiful grandchildren between the three of them. My dh and I raised his oldest son, and we had the other two quite often, every weekend and all summer. BM was a tool, had quite a few rough years with her, but the kids were a joy.

My dh has always been very close to his children and myself as well. Their relationship was strong, dh was a very involved father. Here is the issue that is tearing us apart. When they began marrying and consequently having children, their time with us has decreased more and more. At this point, we have contact and visitation with them and the children only when we initiate it. We make sure we go to see them at least once per month, but they no longer come to our home with the frequency that they once did. They have married incredible people, so that is not the issue at all. We know we are well liked by all of them. All three have great relationships with their perspective in-laws. They also have a good relationship with bm and her husband. They have now become the grandparents really and my husband has been pushed aside. They vacation together, do dinners, and all the normal things grandparents do. We invite them to dinner, and they come of course, but they no longer even call, we do.

We have no idea what has happened. There was no argument, no incident, nothing. A good friend of mine said that in today's day of work, kids activities, and everyday busy lives, there is probably not enough time for three sets of grandparents so we are inadvertently cast aside. I do not accept this, I made sure my kids and skids were engaged in all relatives growing up. Are we wrong in expecting them to be a part of our lives on their own too? We want to have the talk with them but we are not sure how to go about it. We feel we may be perceived as jealous, which maybe we are to some extent. It's hurtful to my husband, myself too.