Have you established paternity, either by DNA test or Affidavit of Parentage?   Are there any court orders in place regarding visitation?   If not, you are free to go where you please.   He could file a motion for visitation and or custody it's quite likely he WILL get visitation and you would be responsible for traveling costs for the child to visit Dad.   

I am thinking that would probably be a poor choice.. personally and legally.  I am assuming that you do have a custody agreement of some type?  You may be a custodial parent, but often the other parent still has "joint" custody and any attempt by you to block his right to see his child might be very negatively viewed by the courts. .. I'm not sure , but kidnapping might actually be a possible charge.

I know it sucks to be forever linked to someone who is toxic.. but you did have a child with this person, so at one point, you thought that they were a good person.  You can't really keep him from having access barring real worry of abuse.  If that's the case, you will have to work through the court system to restrict those rights.

Practically speaking, I suppose it would depend on whether you could actually disappear or not.  This is not 1970.  Actually disappearing is possible but far harder than it used to be!  If you are found, he would have the right to file a petition to have the child brought back to the state.  Most states would not have a statute of limitations on the amount of time if he could show a deliberate attempt to conceal the location of the child.

Parental alienation is not okay. What you want to do is morally reprehensible and may bite you in the rear legally.

Legally speaking, he has the same rights as you until a court says otherwise. Therefore, if you take your baby and run, without a court order saying he can't do that, he could find you and do the same. Additionally, while some places may only give him visitation, there are judges who are not keen at all on parents kidnapping their kids and alienating them from their parent. You could end up losing all custody and having only supervised visitation, ESPECIALLY if you run and try to hide.

Morally speaking, why would you do that to your daughter? And what will you tell her? Will you lie and tell her that her dad abandoned her, making her feel like it's all her fault and then hating a man who didn't abandon her? Or will you tell her that you ran with her, making her potentially hate you? Either way, kids alienated from their parents don't grow up normal. They have real mental health issues. Do you really want to damage your own child because you made a mistake in getting pregnant by someone you don't agree with parenting style on?

Come up with a custody schedule that works for you both. Don't take away his right to be a father and your daughter's right to have a father in her life. A good mother fosters a relationship between child and father. A bad mother runs away and alienates a child because it suits them.

Oh, your one of those.

A good mother fosters a relationship between child and father. A bad mother runs away and alienates a child because it suits them.

^^^^^^

And remember those dads are toxic, bad men. hahahahahahahahha

I suspect your ex is not. Your just done with him except you still want him to pay for his kid, right?

Good Luck,

I am out before i am kicked off this site.

In our experience courts tend to strongly favor single moms. My DW was awarded sole physical and legal custody of SS as a single teen mom.  

She accepted a scholarship at an out of state college with an accelerated degree program.

The SpermClan did eventually file for custody at one point but lost.  At that point visitation was  established with each party responsible for half of visitation travel costs.  SS was 2yo at that point.

States vary on this so do your research and get an attorney who can advise you.

Another woman who thinks a child is her property and she can push the father out. Lovely. 

I hope he takes you to court and gets full custody. I suspect you are the toxic one, not him. Maybe your child will be spared being raised by a selfish mother and alienated from his/ her father. 

Is morally wrong and may come back to bite you.  Get a custody order in place, ask for as much time as you can get. You not being married does not take his rights

DO NOT leave the state and abscond with that man's child..

I'm going to be blunt. If you didn't want to leave your child alone with baby daddy and his kids, why did you have a baby??? Do NOT STEAL this man's child from him. You would be incredibly foolish to do this. Have you considered the legal repercussions that could occur? You could LOSE CUSTODY of your child.

And it sounds like you are already on your way out of this relationship. Do the right thing: end it and establish a CO.

Good gracious. 

Unless there's abuse...I'm not sure why you'd want to deny your child the opportunity to have a relationship with her/his father...just because it's easier and more free for you? 

That's so wrong. Your BF is an equal parent and your child deserves to have that relationship.

5-6 yrs ago. She ran off with their daughters then aged 17 & 9. She told these kids their dad had converted out of their religion and became a christian so it was her duty to protect them. Over a yr after the kidnapping and ceasing all contact and cancelling phone numbers etc, she found out hubby had a Caucasian girlfriend (Me), she reiterated to the daughters “see i did the right thing i had to protect you”. 

Now she was far from the truth, her narcissistic selfishness did whatever she could to keep those girls because she has always seen them as property and the best way to hurt hubby. 

The girls found out inconsistencies in her bullshit but they’ve been brainwashed and tortured their whole life and don’t see it... they confronted their mum about the rubbish stories of me and their dad, she claimed she was a born again religious person... 

the result now are 2 daughters that use the same guilt tactics and narcissistic traits as their mum on their dad. They have no respect for him whatsoever including ss20 who lives with us (he is traumatised from his mum neglecting and abandoning him) that he is incapable of talking about his feelings but uses this guilt to blame everyone for why he is what he is and how he treats others disrespectfully is is not pleasant to be around.

the skids have tried guilting hubby for marrying me and having 2 kids (that i have raised far from the dysfunction) and hubby has seen the major difference 

my husband had been cheated by women with same exwife mentality that it traumatised him from wanting to ever get in another relationship or marry again.... he didn’t want to be hurt that way ever again.

you are coming here asking for advice on kidnapping your child?? Do you even know what lies ahead for you and her? How can you respect someone willing to do that and when they apologise it means bugger all. You can’t give back the time you selfishly took away from a father that has equal rights to your kids

me and my hubby have heeps of issues, we had always planned sending our kids to school in my country as higher level of education, he is fine with that but i have sped the time a little to move back home because of all the skid drama and issues and disrespect and disharmony. But hubby knows where i live, i have never even suggested cutting off contact

when i was at the point of divorce being the only option, i told him so he could understand the severity of this situation and that “ss need more time to change and be a decent human” despite having the 4+ years we’ve been married is ridiculous. Hubby knew i had every right to leave with our kids years ago because its not a healthy environment and he’d been in the middle and not had my back.

if you want a divorce, you have to accept the split custody unless hubby agrees to something else. But don’t ever come here suggesting to kidnap your kids and play the innocent party, there are plenty of ways to handle a dysfunctional marriage/relationship.... kidnapping your kids aint one of them

OP, it sounds like you need space from SO and skids.  Can you go and stay with your parents for a week or take a vacation somewhere just you and baby? The two of you weren't together and now you are again because of the baby. You mentioned that he didn't take a paternity test. Is there even a slight possibility that he may not be the father?  If so, that could be your out.  

I get your fantasy, if I could build a time machine and do things differently I would probably go with artifical inseminiation and not bother with having a man around at all. Do things right, for now you could just live separate and focus on your daughter. No need to do anything rash, take your time with this but do what is right for you, baby, and your sanity.  

I'm guessing your profile pic is of your baby. She's gorgeous! And those cheeks...

I would be more inclined to leave him, stay local near your family/friends/support network, and hope that he doesn't want more than minimal custody. If the only reason you went back to him is because of the child and you're arguing and unhappy, I wouldn't stay.  

If you were awarded sole physical and legal custody you can move where you wish when you wish.  If BioDad has COd visitation you must comply with that order.

Most jurisdictions have local and long distance visitation guidelines.  If you move out the local visitation radius you should initiate a change of visitation to the long distance model.

If you take the kid and deny visitation.... that would be illegal.

All IMHO of course.