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When BM talks about your BF, SO, DH

marissamae88's picture

This past weekend my BM just hit the mother load lol this is my third forum post so if you ladies are getting sick of me I understand and Im sorry I just have no one else to talk to. We had a family meeting with the older ss. ss9, ss7, my SO and I let them know that she lied about texting and calling. We showed them my SO's phone and showed how there were no missed calls or text messages. The boys said they knew she was lying. It upsets me that she is soooo crazy and the boys have to deal with her. I dont go to pick ups or drops offs because I am not needed there and I dont want to cause drama that doesnt needed to be caused but my ss9 told me she wears these dresses that are so short he can see "stuff" sometimes. My advice was to talk to her about it. Well last night at this family meeting the boys said when they went away this passed weekend she wore her too tight dress and she picked the boys up and told them next time they visit she will try to get my SO to come....................where the hell does she get off saying that??? Your not with him anymore you have had boyfriend after boyfriend and he has had two girlfriends and one was me. I told ss9 that he can talk to his dad but I dont think that will be happening and I was sorry if he got his hopes up. He said no I thought it was funny thats why i told you.....ok. He said then she got out of the car to get my ss3 out of seat and her dress ripped up the side and he burst into laughter............I didnt laugh even though I wanted to because when they go see her they will probably talk about me the way they talk about her and I am trying to be as diplomatic as possible. In your opinions am I doing the right thing by just ignoring the jokes they make about her? I dont like this feeling I got when they told me she wanted SO to come with. I thought I was pretty stable in our relationship but I have never had to deal with the possibility she wanted him back.......ew this turns my stomach.

jaohlund's picture

She probably doesn't want him back...she just wants to create trouble! If she has had revolving boyfriends, she is probably jealous of the stable relationship you and BD have together.
I think you're right to ignore the jokes the skids make about BM...just go in the bathroom and laugh your ass off!!

marissamae88's picture

HAHA she is sooo crazy! You are so right ripley she is not a rational person so my first thing to do is rationalize and it is impossible so I will quite doing that and do jaohlund said to do and go in the bathroom and laugh really really hard.

One Life Once Chance's picture

You're right in ignoring her and DEFINITELY go into the bathroom and laugh your ass off!! By her doing it to begin with she is only trying to stir trouble, but lucky for you in the process - the skids are seeing her for who she is. That will be one less battle for you.

This gives you and SO the perfect opportunity to be role models for them as to how things should be handled.

marissamae88's picture

I really do feel bad because I just cant change her or reason with her to show her she is not hurting me or my SO she is hurting her kids and its so sad.

One Life Once Chance's picture

It is VERY SAD - but a lot of them do it. As you said, you can't change her or even reason with her. The best thing you can do is be the best role models for the kids and hope she doesn't taint them too much.

These crazies always worry about themselves, not the kids, and that's why so many of them are the way they are. Mine turned into a major drug addict who is hiding behind the mental health system to stay out of jail. No matter what we did, our hands were tied. All we could do is set the best example we could - unfortunately - she had him sucked in too far by the time we were made aware of any issues.

Keep focus on your relation and the kids - don't worry about her - Karma will raise its head in due time.

marissamae88's picture

That is how my ss9 was. He saw her crazy drug addict ways and heard my SO's family talk alot about her. All of the talk was negative so he started sticking up for her and trying to win her love. It was so sad and he was sooo starved for love it hurt me physically to see him like that. He has made a lot of progress and now can see her as a human being who makes mistakes not this super woman he used to think she was. I think he made her that in his mind because it was too much to see her as she really was. She is so selfish and never thinks about him or the others.