I dont know who knows my story but I will put just a little background in here. I have four ss's and they call me mom and I raise them. Their mom had a drug problem with the last two ss. My SO and her were breaking up in between them. SS3 was born and taken from her because he was born with meth in his system. She admitted to my SO she was trying to kill him just to give you background she is crazy, selfish, and just an ugly person. My SO and I have been dating for two years and she wasnt around until just this past March. She has supervised visits until she decided to do her drug classes and parenting classes. She completed them around March and she wanted joint custody............so we got that court date in May. They gave her EOW unsupervised. So I have been dealing with non stop bull s*** ever since. This past weekend my ss9 came up to me and said he was embarrassed of his mother. I asked why and he proceeded to tell me that she wears such short dresses you see "stuff" sometimes. I was like ooooo ok well the only way she is will know it bothers you is if you talk to her about it. So the next day he comes home and tells me his mom found me on fb....ok even if she did look me up why are you telling your 9 year old. So I said ok.....(I wasnt sure what I was supposed to say) he goes on and tells me she didnt like that I had pictures of the boys up there with me. Ok again not sure what to say. If she had a problem she should have brought it up with my SO not her nine year old. They come home that day and my ss3 (his hair is long because he likes it like that) comes in and his hair look different. I look at it again and why is it in a bob like a girl???? My SO was getting it long enough to donate and BM didnt like it so she chopped it of herself!! He has bangs that look like zig zags! You are not a barber dont touch it you witch! My SO texted her and said he would appreciate it if she did not touch his hair again. She left it alone until this morning and she says I am his mother and I will touch it if I want to. I would appreciate if you dont have anyone else punish my kids. The "anyone else" she is referring to his me and so he became furious! He called her and screamed at her which is of course what she wants. I dont spank or hit them. I give them time outs and lately I have been letting my SO handle punishments because I didnt like the way I was being treated so I told him to handle it. My SO spoke with ss9 to ask who has been telling her I punish them and blah blah blah. My ss9 says I didnt...of course he didnt. Even if he didnt this kid is sooo nosy he at least knows who, what, where, and why. SS9 says she always asks whats going on over here and whos is doing what. She is always asking questions about our relationship. He said " BM told us she calls you all the time to talk to us but you dont ever let her talk to us". This woman has never called for them once! Not once and the one time she texted my SO about communication she said she would like if the boys called her at six. I called the boys in early to have them call her and she did answer! I had them call her again and again she didnt answer so I stopped. You asked them to call you at a specific time and I did that not my SO and you didnt answer. I hate this woman sooooo much. She only wants them now because I am here!!! God how can I make this easier what advice can I give my SO. Anyone out there have the answer or a solution??