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Anyone ever read text messages between your SO and his kids? Yuck.

duct_tape's picture

It makes me sick when I read them. This f'n kid gets all the breaks and deserves none of them. He doesn't do shit to help the family yet his dad treats him like he's such a winner. I'm not sure how much more I can take or for how long.

SS: "Sorry, can't work. Going to the Ozarks for Spring Break. Maybe next week."

DH: "Score! Be careful and don't get in trouble."

SS: "Yah, so and so's dad has a cabin, jet ski blah blah."

DH: "Awesome, sounds like so much fun. Oh, sure you can work when you get back."

What the f' ever. In the mean time, my kids are doing all the work for free. It's starting to affect the way I feel about my dh now. Think I'll sleep in a guest room for a few days. I'm overdone.

bi's picture

sd20 was like this with our dogs, too. and she wants nothing to do with taking care of them. she just wants to call them "hers". fdh had a pug when we met. he had bought it for his exgf and when she left him, she left the dog with him, too. sd would always say he was hers. never fed him or cleaned up after him, never played with him, but he was hers. she told him one day "come and sit by MAMA". and then shot me a look to make sure i knew that i am NOT his mama. seriously? like i give a shit. that dog was fdh's not hers. she came over when she was not even living here and told her guy friend that he was hers. i had just had enough. i told fdh right in front of her. "he's HERS. so she can start cleaning up his messes and buying his food." she didn't like that at all.

i bought fdh a doberman 6 years ago. he wanted one from the time i met him. he had one before and she died of cancer a few months before i met him. so i find out someone fairly local has some dobies for sale and i get him one. i took him with me so he could pick out the one he wanted. we didn't tell the kids. we just brought her home. of course that was her dog, too. not hardly, bitch. i paid a decent price for her and getting her shots and ears done wasn't cheap, either. not to mention she eats like a horse!

then a few years ago fdh bought a doxie so our dobie would have a companion. i was at my mom's when he went to get her. here he comes to my mom's door-with sd. who did not live here. and of course she is proudly carrying the puppy and acting like it's hers. so freaking disgusting. it's not a matter of her being a dog lover, she's really not. (bd17 is). it's a matter of her thinking everything in this house and everything those of us that reside her have is HERS. i'm sure if you asked her right now, she would claim bd's tampons are hers, and fdh's dirty socks are hers, my chap stick is hers, hell the dogs smelly blanket is probably hers, too!

duct_tape's picture

He knows they don't go away. And he also knows that they're on him. He stuck us with one student loan when he first started. It's like $6,000. He got horrible grades, partied, joined a fraternity (private drinking club) and got a dui. I told dh sign another and I'll have another paper for you to sign. He was supposed to make the payments on the one WE took out. Never ever happened. Supposed to work off the payment, never ever happened. All these things quickly get forgotten as soon as he takes dad out to dinner and picks up the tab. If my husband attempts to even discuss bailing his ass out of debt, I'm walking. I'll take my half of everything, and leave.

DeeDeeTX's picture

Does SS kNow most student loans are NOT discharge able in bankruptcy? If he misspends this money, there is no easy fix. He HAS to pay it back.

duct_tape's picture

Misspend? You mean as in MAX OUT ON STUDENT LOANS AND THEN QUIT!!! THIS IS WHAT HE'S DONE. WHAT WOULD MAKE HIM THINK THERE WOULD BE CONSEQUENCES? WHAT THE HELL'S THAT?

Disneyfan's picture

When did it become a bad thing for parents to tell their kids I love and miss you? Hopefully when those kids have kids of their own, they won't be cold and distant with them.

When I hear about young women with much older men, I often wonder about the relationship the woman had with her father when she was growing up.

I sure hope the student loan kid understands that come hell or high water, he will pay those loans back.

My SS went to college for the free money. I think he lasted for a year and half but only earned one semester worth of credits. His school is making him pay back all the free money (@10K) that they threw at him. He's working in a burger joint now. The 2 cars he purchased with the free money are long gone.

PeanutandSons's picture

If you have a cell phone and can text.... Then you are too old to call your father "daddy" at all.

jadedprincess's picture

I'm 26 completley independent and call my father "Daddy" there is nothing wrong with it. idk maybe its just a southern thing, because i know lots of girls my age that call their fathers Daddy.

jumanji's picture

My two are 18 and 21, and we never hang up the phone w/o saying I love you. Never. Even if we've just had a fight, and it's a grudging I love you, we always say it.

Now, no, they don't call me Mommy. Not for a long time. Mom or Madre. But I know adults who call their parents Mommy and Daddy. It's just a matter of what you're used to.

Disneyfan's picture

I think a dad calling his daughter pretty, sweetheat,gorgeous...is sweet.

Calling her sexy or saying she's hot would be creepy.

duct_tape's picture

I'll tell you what's bad. This freakin kid owes me about a year's worth of work and about twenty thousand dollars. He gets student loans, quits school and then proceeds to go around like a newly rich pimp. He's supposed to work for me to pay it back, but instead goes off to f'n spring break with his buds. Instead of his dad setting his ass straight, he tells him, "Score! Have fun!" It's sick. In two years, he's worked two days. And on both, even though they were to pay back a debt, he asked for money.

Disneyfan's picture

Tell him and his dad if he doesn't pay you back by a certain date, you'll sue his ass.

duct_tape's picture

The thing is, you have a skid who treats you like shit, uses you, disrespects you etc. You have a SO who you believe is on the side of right, wanting to correct bad behavior, then you see these messages and what is really going on. No wonder shit never changes. It's all a pack of lies and bull. Some of these horrible kids will only get worse. They have the full support of mommy or daddy dear to the bitter end, regardless of the crap they pull.

If my kids did what this kid does, I'd rake them over hard. They would know I'm pissed, ashamed, and unwillng to support their crap. I would candy coat anything. And I'll tell you what, I get more affection out of my kids in an HOUR, then my husbands gets in ten years. That is no lie. I hear, I love you mom about twenty times a day from my grown kids.

overit2's picture

Bf calls me gorgeous, if he called sd that I would vomit in his face, no lie.

ESPECIALLY since she looks exactly like her mother lol

duct_tape's picture

You know, it's not even just the money part. What the hell is wrong with saying, "I'm not proud of you. Why should I be? You're an embarrasment to me right now. You tell me when I'm an embarrasment, you're a f'n embarrasment. Change or stay away. I love you but really do not like who you are."

bearcub25's picture

SO will try and tell me cute little SS stories and I just stare at him.

Listening to the vice principal at school telling me about all his rude, bullying ways doesn't make the stories cute, it screams this 12 yo has the maturity level of a 4 yo.

duct_tape's picture

OMG! Me too. I usually feel really guilty afterwards though. He always says, "are you listening?"

Mmm Hmmm...I'm here.

ctnmom's picture

Duct tape, I couldn't agree more. I have 3 bios, not a loser in the bunch, and I've never had a problem saying, "not good enough- you'll need to do better".Love my kids, tell them I love them, but part of parenting is pointing out when they're effing up. DH never did the over the top slobbering with CTBB, but he always had those damned rose colored glasses on. But of course, no such glasses with our bios. Makes no never mind though cause they've turned out great. Well, DD12 is still only 12, but a great trouble free kid.

cpreston's picture

I read them when I have the chance… SS always seems to want to text while we are in the car… so I guess he thinks my DH is stupid enough to text and drive because DH will say “text back to him and say…” so after I hit send, I always scroll back and see what’s been going on… usually it’s stupid stuff, but a few times I’ve read where SS was asking DH to babysit his son, while his g/f was at school so he could go “hang with my boys”
Thanks G-D he said no! I don’t mind watching their kid for valid reasons, but SS going and getting drunk while is g/f is at school and we are watching his child is NOT a valid reason!

buterfly_2011's picture

Yea I have read them...

SO: We are going to Dairy Queen
SD: Oh how fun I wish I was with you Daddy (NO SHE DOESN'T)
SO: I wish you were too
SD: I love you Dad
SO: I love you daughter...

It makes me sick because she is twisted. She is CHOOSING TO NOT Be here.