Has anyone done the social study thing before?
Bm's mom beat her up and tried to move back in w/ her. My DH filed a restraining order which was in effect until the hearing where she claimes she is now living w/ her ex-fiancee's mom, but hardly any of my SD's things are there because the house she's staying in is for sale. My DH and I hope the person who does the social study will see right through her. She is completely unstable. She seems to believe that because she is temporarily staying in a $400,000 house she will be seen as the one who should continue to designate SD's primary residence.
If we do have to go through w/ the social study we are hoping it will be obvious SD will be much more stable here. We are wondering if it will be possible for us to show the evaluator the stuff we have printed off BM's Myspace. She really doesn't diplay herself as a very good role model. Not to mention she has no child care right now so my DH and I pick SD up from her daily and she picks her up from me when she gets off work on her days.
Just really curious what a social study is like. DH and I decided to try to work out a rule 11 w/ BM and try to get back on good terms w/ her for SD's sake, but it really feels like we are bending over backwards to please her and she's not giving us s--t! Maybe she social study would be best for SD in the end? I would appreciate any info or opinions.
Thanks.
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Crazy!
What a crazy, whacked out situation. (I read your other blog, just haven't had a chance to respond.) I think you can count on this... whomever does the study will probably see through the sham, but regardless of what the study reveals, unless they find serious issues, it may not make a damn bit of difference. I hope I'm wrong, but you just never know. There's just no way to predict how they will interpret a situation. I think it's mostly true that if the children aren't in danger, then they will not intervene.
The only personal, firsthand experience I have with this is we had to have social services investigate us before my husband could adopt my son. And yes, we had to pay for it and yes, it's just another way the "system" screws you out of money for nothing. But we were free to share any pertinent info with her, so I would assume you could do the same with the MySpace stuff.
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Thank you so much for the
Thank you so much for the response and info. My DH and I have considered it may be a waste of time and money (ours because the judge ordered my husband to pay for all of it) because unless the social evaluator were to spend significant time with BM they prob. wouldn't see how damaged she really is. She does put on a pretty good show playing the innocent damzel in distress, we're pretty sure that's how she scored the fiancee with a wealthy mom the last go round in court, and the room in the mom's house now. It's good to hear the evaluator may be open to info if we do have to go that way. We know better than to bash her, we just want to share our concerns. Thanks again.:)
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I---
I took the one less traveled by,
and that made all the difference.
Hi
I need help. I'm lost and don't know where to turn.