Well DH and I talked Friday night, he denied that he was mad about anything. He said that he figured out that I was mad that he gave money to skid. I told him that is part of it but not the whole picture. I said I am mad because it never changes, the rules are not enforced, I am the first to the house in the morning and the last to return but I end up doing all the cooking and all of the cleaning with little appreciation from some people, and down right none and blatant disrespect from others. I am expected to play my role and have responsibilities in this house but skid who signed a contract regarding rules in the house is not expected to live by them. Meanwhile people have to tippy toe around him and not say a word. I told him I am just tired of it.

Last week we were away out of town for 4 days. Upon returning home the house looked reasonable. However I noticed that skid had rummaged through my office, found a half smoked joint in my family room, a piece of note paper put into the couch that said “bitch” in this writing (not sure if that was left there just for me since he knows that I am the only one that takes the couch cushions off to vacuum), all my towels used because he is too lazy to do this own laundry and wash his own towels. Just feel that there is no respect from him for this house or the other people in it.

My DH told me that I can not change his parenting style, and he cannot say anything to his kid because he is “not built that way” and then because the heat was on his 20 year old he had to point out my 18 year old son (who lives with us half time) did not unload the dishwasher on Thursday when he had no school. Really???? That all you got??? His kid never unloads the dishwasher and breaks all the house rules. At least mine does not break the rules. I did mention to my son that he left Thursday without unloading the dishwasher and leaving dishes in the sink, immediately he said sorry and apologized to DH. He was just being an absent-minded 18 year old, which I get sometimes. Meanwhile his kid never unloads the dishwasher.

I told DH Friday night that I can not control what he does or how he handles things, however as a home owner I am not willing to put up with it and I am calling going to be callings skid on his shit. He said nothing except he said “Maybe we shouldn’t have moved in together and gotten married until the boys were out of the house”. I have felt that way about this situation, but I have never said it because at this point it is too late and there is no going back and to say something like that is just would be said to hurt the other person. Before we moved into our first house together that we were purchasing on the other side of the City I asked him if skid was ok with that and he said “I don’t care, he is an adult and if he does not like it he can move out and that I have made enough sacrifices for my kid and waited until his was 18 before making any changes”.

Skid was suppose to start paying rent this month on February 1st in the amount of $300.00 and when the 1st arrived, he whined to his Dad that he did not have enough money to pay rent he said that he would pay it on his next cheque. Friday was pay and skid left $260.00 in our office on DH’s desk and went out for the evening. I asked DH why the rent is short $40. DH told me that he is giving his son a break on starting to pay rent this month and the money collected is for his car insurance and cell phone that is due on the 22nd , which comes out of our account and not to transfer funds for these items into my son’s savings because his son paid for his cell and insurance. My DH is not liking the fact that what we do for one, we do for the other, because if his skid does not pay these items by the 22nd I would have transferred funds in the same amount to a savings account intended for my son. But know he is trying to say that he paid it, I don’t agree, the $260 I am accounting has rent that was shorted $40 and I will still transfer the funds near the end of this month to the savings account.

So needless to say Friday night’s talk was not great but was not a disaster. I feel somewhat better getting things off my chest and putting DH on notice that I will just handle things myself. I should not have to handle things by myself, I will be forever resentful for that, but I can only control me.

Saturday morning at 5:00 am I had to wake skid and GF off the couch and tell him to drive her home now (she was suppose to be out by 2:00 am). Everyday there is a a rule off the contact broken. More rules broken as the day wore on. Skid left his laundry in the dryer because he can never finish before leaving the house for the night. I needed to finish my laundry that he interrupted so I put his laundry from the dryer into the basket and went up to his room to leave the basket on the bed. I walked into the messy room (another broken rule) and I could smell the pot. He is not allowed to have drugs on the property or bongs, pipes etc. It took me 2 seconds to find the ½ ounce of pot, which costs $150 in our City. Found garbage, empty shopping bags and receipts on the floor and the receipts were for his spending in the last 2 days. $100 in clothing for himself, $55 on flowers for GF, $75 on a Pandora charm for GF, $120 on a bong (to smoke with weed I found). So he tells his Dad he is too broke to pay rent but the above totals $500. Not to mention that he was taking GF out to dinner, which is another $80.00, and up to an observation tower in our city which is another $40 for the two of them. So in two days that brings the total to $620 crap. But he is too broke to pay rent? No he just thinks he is entitled to a free ride.

I took the pot and disposed of it. Skid will be so pissed off and I don’t care because I am beyond that. I did not say anything last night to DH, I wanted to enjoy one night of peace without us fighting about his kid or him pouting because his kid is such an f-up. I knew that skid is sleeping over at GF’s (parents) house(that’s another story, what kind of parent lets her 17 year old daughter’s BF sleepover), I know I will not have to deal with skid until sometime later today.

I am going to let my DH know that I am done talking and I am taking action. His kid can leave, go live with friends, go live with GF and her parents or go to his bio-mom’s or on the streets but I am so done with this bullshit.