You're not alone. I wish BM would fall off a cliff. EXCEPT that we would have SD12 EVERY week instead of every other. I can't stand either of them, really.

I feel this way sometimes too. Its mainly when BM tries to pick fights or puts DH in a crappy mood and I have to deal with him for the rest of the day. My SS2 isn't difficult (yet) and spends most of his time with us. He's a completely different child when he's with different parents myself included. He's an entitled spoiled brat when he is with his mom, needy when he is with his dad but otherwise self sufficient then when he is with me he's well behaved and self sufficient without the whiny "dadddyyyy, dadddddyyyy"s all day.

I've noticed that I usually get these thoughts around certain times: when SS2 has just come back from BMs, when AuntyFlow is about to visit or when SS has a cold or feeling sick. I've tried to fight and prepare for each of these scenarios but it gets hard. BM doesn't enforce nap times or bedtime or healthy food habits or even getting off the couch. So he comes homes with bags under his eyes whining about the dog looking at him the wrong way and when fights against laying down even though we know he is tired. So like you say I've "disengaged" for the most part but she still finds a way to seep into our house and cause problems.

I can't say that I haven't told DH that some of the problems we have are because he decided to impregnate the devil's handmaiden but SS2 is here and there isn't anything we can do to change him or the way he is being raised at BMs because she still thinks she's MOTY and the best thing since sliced bread. You definitely are not alone though and Im glad I have someone to commiserate with too.

Of course, you are not the only one. Never once have I been glad the SDs existed.

Literally today I was thinking that I wish he'd sign away his rights and thought to myself how bad of a person I must be to wish this. I'm glad I'm not alone. *sigh of relief!* I would never tell him that though, and if he told me that about my kids I'd leave him.

I don't wish death on BM ONLY because then we'd have SD full time and yeah then I'd be gone full time. The thought of that kind of makes me wish my exH and I didn't divorce, I'd rather have THAT life - and that's bad!!

I, too, wish BM would go away forever, and then realize we'd have SD full-time and uuuuuggggghhhh. Sometimes I want SD to go away forever, too, and then realize my SO would be so hurt by that, that I have to mentally take it back.

The worst part is that when SD is here, SO doesn't do much with her. She has a TV in her room and she stays up there pretty much the whole time, and when she does come down, SO acts annoyed with her, as he admittedly enjoys our childfree time. That makes me wonder why he even wants her around (and hell, if he can't even enjoy her, screw his expectation that *I* should enjoy her!)... and the sad thing is, I think it's just because he wants so badly for people to think he is a good dad (and he IS a good dad, in that he enforces rules, provides for her, protects her, and so on). I don't think he actually enjoys her, and I think he feels so guilty about that, that he can't even let himself recognize that he does not enjoy her. Poor guy, poor kid, and poor me!

I've thought about why he didn't wear a condom with bm and even asked him why. It has nothing to do with sks- I get along with them- but I cannot figure out what induced him to get into bed with bm once, let alone twice. I asked him if he was on drugs or something

I knew a bar in New Jersey where you can hire a hit man. Send me a private message.

I tell my DH all the time..."don't we know someone who can ""Take care"" of her" but then, like all of you, I realize we would have the little demons all the time and I think that would be worse. Ive thought many times that the kids would be better off without us, the constant shuffling back and forth and no consistency is hard on them. When I was a kid I did the back and forth until I was 12 and it was hell. I went to live with my dad at 12 and didn't see my mom because she was nuts. It was so much easier than the back and forth.

Oh, HELL YEAH! I hear you, loud and clear!!

I find myself fantasizing sometimes about a tornado zooming down on her house and sweeping her away. I dream about her waking up to find snakes in her bed. or crocodiles. or spiders. Then I snap out of it when I realise SD would have to stay with us - shit, I'd rather walk on porcupines than put up with her.

Funny thing is, lately, SO has been saying that he wishes like hell we'd gotten together years ago..and he's been saying it pretty often. SO's sister and I are close friends and have known eachother for over 20 years. I kinda knew SO but he seemed like such a "goody two shoes" to me, I pretty much ignored him 'cos I was in LOUD party animal mode at the time (in my 20's then). Anyway..SO's sis brought him to a party we were having. I flirted with him and teased him... so he kissed me. Man alive! I NEVER forgot that kiss. I thought about it for YEARS. That's the time he speaks about - if we'd only gotten together then (sigh!).. however, if we did, I wouldn't have my precious boys and he wouldn't have his kids.

Sometimes I have thought that I should have encouraged DH to allow BM to take SD10 to her country of origin upon their separation/divorce. Things would have been so much easier financially and emotionally (so I like to day dream)...that's all BM said she wanted...but in reality, it wouldn't have been the right thing to do, and I'm sure there would have been an equal or greater nightmare on the other side of that decision.

I wish every single day that BM will get fed up that nobody wants her skanky ass here in the US and just pack up and move already.

Yes! Back when DH was handing over a big chunk of his income to BM for C.S. and we were struggling. I'd say, "spendy piece of ass there, hon. Condoms are free at the health clinic!" Or "was she worth it?" Or "what the hell, did you lose a bet?" I actually DID say mean shit to him. It pissed me off to watch that money fly out the goddamned window every month!

DH's ex is fat and has huge coke-bottle glasses! YUCK!!!

As much grief as Donkeykong has caused our lives, I wish him no ill will. SS will most likely be devastated and he will be even MORE clingy to DW (would that be even possible?).

Besides, everytime Donkeykong gets into a tiff with us, we hand his ass back to him. Every. Single. Time. And we just laugh at him.

He's like the character Muerte from "Undercover Blues". Guy thinks he's big and bad, but each attack he initiates ends up badly for him.

I wish every day my SD didnt exist.

The BM tainting our lives is a skanky ho. Quite honestly, I cannot believe she hasn't contracted an STD. Although she has been going to the doctor recently for...rearend problems.

There are definitely times I wish the earth would open up and swallow her, but Satan probably doesn't want the competition. That, and then the skids would have to live with us full time... YIKES!!!

Definitely not alone -_-

In my case they DID use a condom and DH had already dumped her - it was that fateful, stupid 'go back to your ex for guaranteed sex' idiocy - she sabotaged the condom!

I love my beautiful SD4 more than life itself, and couldn't imagine my life without her - I just hate the pain and anguish that BM puts her through.

Oh you are not alone. Well said!!! I wish BM would get lost somewhere! And never be found....Maybe she can take my skid's on that trip with her too

Oh you are not alone. Well said!!! I wish BM would get lost somewhere! And never be found....Maybe she can take my skid's on that trip with her too

Oh you are not alone. Well said!!! I wish BM would get lost somewhere! And never be found....Maybe she can take my skid's on that trip with her too

Oh you are not alone. Well said!!! I wish BM would get lost somewhere! And never be found....Maybe she can take my skid's on that trip with her too

Oh you are not alone. Well said!!! I wish BM would get lost somewhere! And never be found....Maybe she can take my skid's on that trip with her too

I am so sorry my computer must have had a glitch and posted a repeat, like 9 times...Damn computer...my apologies

Why would you feel bad about wishing for the end of a toxic influence in your life? :?

I always hoped for a well place meteor strike on a Sperm Clan family reunion myself. Or a cluster of lightening. Or a storm of cantaloupe sized hail, etc............ }:)

Since the Skid never went to a Sperm Clan reunion any of those would be a fortuitous weather or stellar event and would have very nicely ended the toxic toothless moronic influence of the shallow and polluted end of my Skid's gene pool.

We can dream.