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You can't make this sh*t up

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 9:32am

Today is the hearing! Great right?

Nope. Major storms game through KS last week and out attorneys office doesn't have power. So no access to his server. All we have for court in 3 hrs is what I could print off based on things I sent him because I could access my work email at my MIL's old office (she retired last year!).

Freaking KS. We are so fucked. 

Pray for us. 

Comments

ICanMakeIt's picture

Submitted by ICanMakeIt on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 9:55am

for any internet stranger in my life. FIngers and  toes cross with all the good vibes being sent your way.

<3 

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 10:04am

Sending you all the positive vibes I can muster. You deserve a break. Hoping for a miracle for you.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Submitted by Exjuliemccoy on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 10:29am

So this attorney had nothing prepared Friday for his Monday morning appearance??

What. An. Incompetent. Idiot.

CajunMom's picture

Submitted by CajunMom on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 10:43am

and anything else I can muster up. Good vibes, healing energy, good thoughts....all of it. May the outcome be totally in your favor.  

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Submitted by TheAccidentalSM on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 11:09am

I'm willing karma in your direction.  What a clusterf###.

Mominit's picture

Submitted by Mominit on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 11:10am

20 min until you start.  Praying for miracles and blessings!

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 11:11am

Once again, your attorney is an idiot. Who doesn't have a paper file prepared for court ahead of time? Did he ever get BM's tax records and the employer served?

I am thinking the most positive thoughts for you today.  You deserve to win big!

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 3:43pm

This disgusting piece of human trash got 20K.

The judge wouldn't listen to anything. Again.

ICanMakeIt's picture

Submitted by ICanMakeIt on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 3:59pm

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know this isn't helpful, but now you are officially done correct? Completely and totally?

That is the only brightside I can conjur at the moment. <3 We are all here for you when you are ready to chat more. 

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 5:07pm

Yes, we are now 100% completely done. It's over. 

That is literally our only solace. We have also made the decision to cut SS from health insurance even though it doesn't cost us anything. 

barbKarin's picture

Submitted by barbKarin on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 5:26pm

I know you're feeling emotional and you have every right to be. But I really think you should rethink the health insurance part.

Because god forbid your stepson needs to pay for some life-saving procedure. No matter what your husband promises to you now, he WILL give money to his child.

Just leave him on it until it costs you to keep him on.

I have seen this very same situation happen. The father was estranged but still handed over 30K because no matter what, very few parents will be able to say no when their child might die.

Cover1W's picture

Submitted by Cover1W on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 6:53pm

Just concentrate on getting that paid down stat.

I take it you were covering him because it was the right thing to do? I would myself remove him at the next open enrollment period (there has to be a qualified event to do so before that date), if it's not in the CO to do so. Cut the cord. She wants full control, she's got it.

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 5:16pm

The system is rigged against fathers.

1st3rd5thWEInHell's picture

Submitted by 1st3rd5thWEInHell on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 5:07pm

20k in arrears or 20k in CS? In any case, this CS expense + your legal fees and her legal fees (if you are dealing with a judge like that lol) are a heavy financial burden...

This is why most ppl on CS will never do a review or modification because even tho BMs have had a change of income or circumstances, they know how to hide it very well and are skilled at providing the right accounts and putting money in hidden accounts. Not to mention, she will also claim all sorts of expenditures and barely has to provide proof - an eyewitness or supporting statement will be enough for the judge. If her mother shows up in court and says "I saw her spend xyz on food or activities or daycare for the children", its a wrap. Some of the more insisting judges will report the hearing until further evidence is provided, but even they will side to give her additional funds or at least keep it the same (no reduction in this world even if the BD is homeless or sick with an incurable disease on his death bed)

You should never return to court again unless you are looking to spend more money on her and on the incompetent attorney

 

The attorney already knew you wouldnt win and had a flimsy case, thats why he didnt bother printing any paperwork or preparing beforehand. The subpoena of accounts was a joke and BMs know how to play around

 

It we were to subpoena BM1 acct, we wouldnt find any substantial proof of income because she does OF and leaves her money sitting in cashapp/paypal/linktree account. As you know those accounts have no bearings and can be opened at the drop of a dime. You can leave money sitting there for months or years and use cashapp cards or paypal credit cards for transactions without ever having to use your legitimate bank account

BM2 lives off the kindness and generosity of others and has never really held a job due to drugs and alcohol. Her parents support her financially. She has started doing doordash and uber recently - again you can choose to withdraw your pay whenever you want and let it sit in your accounts permanently. On top of that, she probably does not make much (very lazy). She had a job between 2018 and 2020 as a part time receptionist in a real estate company (thanks to her mother and stepfather) but had to quit after she developed liver disease and nearly died due to her alcoholism during the pandemic

I feel that women should be very aware and cautious before getting wity someone who has CS and lazy exes. It has cost our household thousands of dollars....Other couples have the financial freedom to care only about their expenses and financial management but we have to constantly worry about CS, medical support, activities, clothes and shoes. Too bad that we shill money for everything especially for BM2....when we arent providing for her kids, it usually would be her parents....

 

Messy finances and if I had known I would have never gotten involved with someone who will forever be financially tied to other households

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Submitted by Rumplestiltskin on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 5:32pm

My SO has a court date next month and BM2 is the same type of shady grifter as you describe. Works for cash and hides assets in her mom's name, and CashApp and Venmo type accounts. This trifling b-word is in all likelihood about to get a raise, though she spends it all on herself. Who the fk needs a $4000 purse and a different luxury car every 3 years, but claims income barely over minimum wage? These scumbags have no shame. 

1st3rd5thWEInHell's picture

Submitted by 1st3rd5thWEInHell on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 7:11pm

She will 100% get it, sorry to hear that. We are paying the price for these mens past mistakes and poor decision making

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Tue, 07/18/2023 - 9:17am

Chef started out with take home pay weekly of $60 after taxes and non arrears CS (he volunteered to overpay)  that was in 2004.   That went on until 2014 where his take home pay "increased" to $150 weekly (wouldn't even be able to pay for a studio apt at 2014 prices). This was after OSS accidentally "prematurely" alienated himself at age 18.5.  And the Girhippo was not going to report that OSS had actually moved in with his uncle so she could keep collecting on him.

Chef still has 5.5 months to go till the last of the three reach 21.  Although CS is now a quarter of what it was starting out, what did he get for all this money?

All 3 are mediocre at best, failed their way up and have been alienated for 15 yrs now.

F'NG A:

"I feel that women should be very aware and cautious before getting wity someone who has CS and lazy exes. It has cost our household thousands of dollars....Other couples have the financial freedom to care only about their expenses and financial management but we have to constantly worry about CS, medical support, activities, clothes and shoes."

1st3rd5thWEInHell's picture

Submitted by 1st3rd5thWEInHell on Mon, 07/17/2023 - 7:10pm

A lifetime of misery and financial ruin. Thankfully, you were able to make sound financial decisions for yourself. I have to live with the fact that we will never be able to achieve certain things financially due to these households being supported...including going on vacation, purchasing a home, purchasing brand new furniture or simply saving for retirement plans. I have a retirement plan and I go on vacation alone once year but my husband will probably have to work his entire life to provide and pay for these ppl so no end in sight.

OSS21 is fully dependent on his father financially and has no life skill. SS17 claims he will go to the navy after dropping out of high school but he sits on his mothers couch and plays video games 24/7 and couldnt even keep a fast food job. SS15 will probably drop out as soon as he turns 16yo. All these boys constantly ask for money and things while their BMs are enjoying/enjoyed CS for years. OSD23 is fairly independent thanks to OF and sex work so I am happy for that.

They are all failures and will never have any skills. They dont like their father because they are actively alienated but they need him for money so they smile in his face and talk crap behind his back. OSS21 only reaches out for money or a job and my husband falls for it - a one sided relationship

All this money for ungrateful useless brats....The only return I ever asked was that they become independent when they reach 18 but even that does not seem to happen...

I warn every single person i know....The finances are the biggest drawback to being with a person who has multiple children.....huge handicap

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Submitted by TheAccidentalSM on Tue, 07/18/2023 - 7:21am

But at least the torture is over.  

I know you are hurting but I'd hold off on taking SS off health insurance.   If it doesn't cost anything, leave it in place for the time being and reconsider when you have a bit of distance from this event.

1st3rd5thWEInHell's picture

Submitted by 1st3rd5thWEInHell on Tue, 07/18/2023 - 12:46pm

Its time to follow the court order. 20k in CS will be more than enough for BM to provide health care to her child. She is the primary parent and receives ample compensation from her ex to be able to get her children insured.

BM2 receives CS + medical support. In 2021, she revealed that she had never enrolled the children in any type of medical and she asked if we could put them under our insurance. The response was yes if she drops portion of the support, after that crickets. They arent concerned about their childrens health if money comes first

Responsibilities are established in the court order and have been recently enforced with a $20k ruling....I think she can very well find a plan or get medicaid/chip if she is THAT low income