Automatic CS Review?
My SO recently got served papers at home by a sheriff's deputy requiring him to appear in court next month for a CS review. It lists SO as "defendant" and he has to produce financial documents going back 3 years because they have reason to believe he is paying less than he should. He said his lawyer told him the state may have automatically initiated this. But, in the past 11 years, this has never happened and last year, one of the 2 kids turned 18. Does this just happen automatically or would BM have had to initiate it? USA/Louisiana. Does anyone have experience with this? I fear BM is up to something. He has continued to pay CS for both kids even though one of them turned 18 about 17 months ago. This should make SO have to pay less, not more, right?
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ETA, would him having just
ETA, would him having just filed his income taxes have triggered a review? His income didn't go up significantly.
"Now.. why has your SO been
"Now.. why has your SO been subsidizing his X's lifestyle for 17mos on a kid he is no longer obligated to support."
That was my question. Like many of the below replies, he was advised by his lawyer to "not poke the bear." I think everyone should get the amount of CS they are legally owed, and fair is fair. But - my SO has been getting royally screwed for years, partially with the help of some of his own family members. They are all from the same country (BM, SO, and family), and some of his family never forgave SO for leaving BM for an American (not me, this was years before i met him.)
SO has had SS 19 solely for 6 years (probably longer but since i've been around i know for a fact SS has lived with SO 100%), but he has had to pay CS on him because he couldn't convince the judge of that. People lied for BM. Prior to me coming along, SO had SS13 almost every night, too. BM would come visit the kids at SO's house and cook meals but not keep either overnight except sporadically. Now, SO keeps SS 13 his entire week, then on BM's week, he keeps SS13 after school until SS19 brings him to BM any time between 4 and 8. She does keep SS (or someone besides SO does) for a full weekend every other weekend.
SO has been paying her 700 a month for 10 years. He tried to get it reduced a few years ago, but BM and her witnesses convinced the court to allow her to keep getting CS on SS19, and they were to go to reunification therapy. She also filed an ex-parte trying to get full custody, which was full of what i knew to be lies, and eventually the judge saw that, but just ordered back 50/50 on paper.
I have looked up everything i can on the state website and everything says that a parent has to request a modification. SO is going in without a lawyer, which i believe to be a giant mistake. I think BM is up to something and will come in guns blazing. I'm very disappointed in all this, as I thought things were getting manageable. We got engaged, though i gave the stipulation that i wouldn't marry until my daughter is graduated and out of the house (she is a junior in HS.) This is a lot of bullsh!t and i am leery of mixing my finances if there is a chance any can go to this bottom-feeding cowbird. She works for cash and supposedly has 10 rental properties (according to SO's mom), but no proof of this can be found. Her family is shady with business so they may be in someone else's name. Her reported income yearly is like 3k but her lifestyle is fancy (big house, luxury SUV, purses costing same as 3 months of my mortgage.) There must be a way to prove her income. I just wonder if SO is up to fighting back or he will just pay.
Update: I found evidence of 2
Update: I found evidence of 2 of her rental properties. She spells her name different, one letter off, and uses her mother's address as her address. I'm going to forward the info to SO for him to send to his lawyer. I found at least 6 more properties listed but i'm not wasting my day doing the legwork. I've already done more than my SO.
She also seems to have
She also seems to have several different birth dates she uses, but they all trace back to either her phone number or my SO's address (which i guess was her only official address that she really did live at.)
Holy COW...
Holy COW...
Where there is smoke there is fire.
Either BM initiated it OR the
Either BM initiated it OR the state is trying to clean up cases due to the public health emergency ending which ends next month. A lot of government and legal entities are cleaning up and auditing cases since the PHE backed up a lot of financial and legal proceedings. Can you contact the FOC to determine why the review is being conducted and who requested it? But honestly, my bet is on BM.
I'm going to try calling to
I'm going to try calling to see what i can find out.
CS guidlines vary from state
CS guidlines vary from state to state. Maybe Cajun can chime in on this?
I do know CS doesn't always decrease when one child ages out. My DH was advised not to poke the bear when his eldest aged out as his income had increased significantly since the last CS review. He continued to pay the same amount until his second child turned eighteen, then petitioned to have the CS order terminated. BM1 could have requested a review at any point, but she's not the brightest bulb. And in our state (CA), CS doesn't automatically stop. You have to petition the court to terminate the order.
i'M IN Florida
But North Korea waited until one of the two stepkids aged out past 18 and then did a child support increase modication request. She is really dumb. He too would have continued just paying for two as to not poke the bear, His child support was not only knocked in half but he was served credit for overpayment from the moment she filed so she pretty much ended her child support with that little stunt. I hope it works out for you as well.
This chick is dumb, too, but
This chick is dumb, too, but has family members who are like almost mafia or something, from what i've heard. Shady business deals and finding loopholes for everything. At least i've been told she is dumb, but she seems to be running circles around my SO when it comes to custody and CS, all the while acting like she can't read or keep a schedule because of her "limitations." I guess when you have unlimited time and resources and no sense of integrity, that beats honest.
Toxic Troll is dumb as rocks too...
However she managed to figure out how to file ex parte, and file for child support, and win tax claiming rights as well as figure out how to get housing assistance in a beach town...only paying 281$ monthly...and just got a chuck of cas$ 21K.
So, she may be dumb in some ways, but is smart enough to know how to play victim and obtain advice...and fill out paperwork.
She sounds MUCh shadier than Toxic Troll and her family is probably using her as a type of "umbrella" or shield for their other interests...
Yeah. BM is definitely just
Yeah. BM is definitely just one of what i understand to be a very bad bunch. I know that when she and SO were married, he found a secret bank account that she had that had almost $100k in it. And she had no job and hadn't worked their entire marriage. Had to be some shady money hidden for the family u less she was slowly siphoning it from him. She also used to constantly call and text SO, like Toxic Troll, but SO did put boundaries in place and now she does only communicate when necessary, maybe once a week. That's one reason i agreed to get engaged. It does piss a person off to see these scumbags seemingly "winning." I'm trying really hard not to let the stress of this affect the rest of my life.
Hey, Rumplestiltskin,
Hey, Rumplestiltskin,
You've written:
'I'm trying really hard not to let the stress of this affect the rest of my life.'
Good luck with that! Tolstoy wrote,
'All happy families resemble one another but each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.’
I’m convinced that our members have experienced more incidences and varieties of domestic unhappiness and more stress than Tolstoy could have imagined.
My own stepparenting experience, coupled with the reading that I’ve done on StepTalk, has convinced me that the relentless stress we stepparents undergo can result in significant (both physical and psychological) health problems; hear me Evil4?
Your decision to postpone marriage until your daughter graduates from high school is very wise, particularly since BM and her family appear to be involved in some shady dealings. Hon, I would think long and hard before committing myself to a lifetime involvement with your SO’s family. Contrary to popular belief, graduations, weddings, grandchildren and other events ensure that steplife can be forever!
By all appearances, you are a woman who uses her head, rather than viewing her fiancé through rose-coloured glasses. As is often mentioned on this site, love is not always enough. Please choose wisely!
Yeah, this is stressing me. I
Yeah, this is stressing me. I want to feel more sorry for SO, and i do feel sorry for him, but i'm also angry that he catered to her for all these years and only set limits when i came around (I told him that if his babymamma was going to come over and make dinner and call him 10 times a day, i was out!) She was used to having things her way and now he is paying for setting limits. Amd ao am i!
He took the info i dug up and
He took the info i dug up and gave it to his lawyer. He is thinking of hiring a PI. I said please do. This woman only has had one of her 2 kids every other weekend for years. The younger one is brought to her an hour or two before bedtime on her week on school nights. The rest of the time he is at SO's. This b should be paying CS, no matter what her income, because she sees him as little as she possibly can. And on lots of her weekends, she sends him to SO's brother (they don't speak because the brother chose BM over SO - they even dated after the divorce.) I may drop the dime to the IRS. These people are shady but not violent as far as i know.