DH, both stepsons, myself and BM together for oldest stepson (SS18) HS graduation night.  BM in town for 2 days to spend time with her son.  DH has full custody and BM lives out of state and only sees them a few days a year (her choice) while contributing ZERO to her sons financially.  I had no problem with my feelings towards her until she started causing problems for us in many ways, but still remained friendly towards her.  She was friendly for the first year or so, then suddenly she had a problem with me, so I just ignore her now unless she speaks to me first (easy to do since I only saw her once in the last 2 years).

So for grad night I sucked it up for a few hours so youngest SS16 could spend the evening with both his parents watching his older brother graduate.  Other than that night, DH and myself went out of our way to ensure she had as much time alone with her sons as possible.  The majority of grad night she talked LOUDLY and one upped me on everyting I said. (We are both in our 40s!).  I would ignore her every time while remaining casually friendly to her the whole evening. 

But what really got to me is why the hell was she following me around, constantly invading my personal space, and peeping around DH to watch me whenever I was able to put him between the both of us?   She would always just keep standing RIGHT next to me wherever I was and run her mouth obnoxiously.  Then walking so closely behind me I could practially feel her breath on the back of my neck. Something about that reminded me when people try to make themselves appear threatening by stepping up in someones face.  She of course remained sickly sweet in front her sons while practically standing on top of me most of the evening.

I was surprised at the primal response I felt - I went on guard prepareing to fight her any moment (it just came up as a natural reaction). I had wanted to have a pleasant, relaxing evening but her physical behavior made me want to knock her out-LOL.    Has anyone ever had a BM do something like that?  It was just so childish and weird...and it felt like she was trying to be threatening (which made me even angrier that she was acting that way at her son's graduation).  I had begun to wonder if she had been coached by her harpy friends or boyfriend to act like that thinking she could get under my skin, or if she is just an insecure, petty, absent mother?