I think I've finally nailed the primary issue that seems to be the root of everything behavior-related in my SS5. Has anyone ever dealt with this? To what extent is this normal? --- (I also want to say, I do understand that he may not be that good yet at processing multiple-step instructions, but I hope I can express here what I mean, that it's MORE than just that.)

If SS5 has a thought or idea in his head, he cannot stray from that idea. If any instruction is given during that process, it simply doesn't register. Let me give examples:

- Last winter, he was a slow poke one morning and DH was home. I left with DS, and told SS that "I'm leaving now, so I'm not late for work. Daddy will have to bring you to daycare." He ended up freaking out, leaving the house and attempting to chase me down the snowy street (without me knowing), a stranger found him and picked him up. My husband ended up having to chase him down and explain what happened to these people! SS had literally not processed the 2nd part of what I said.

- A simple example from this morning: All SS has to do is get dressed (I pick out his clothes otherwise it takes way too long), and brush his teeth. He ran past me up the stairs and I said, "Did you brush your teeth yet, SS?" No response, kept going, holding his Hulk mask. I repeated it. Non responsive to me. He proceeds to go over to his sister and try to scare her with the mask.

- One recent evening, SS was blowing bubbles in his glass of milk through the straw. I wasn't too concerned with it at first but he started getting too over the top. So I said "Easy now, let's be done with doing that." He looked at me as if he understood. But kept blowing. I said, "SS? Did you hear? Please stop that now and eat your dinner." He continued to look at me, pause, and continue. I said, "Can you hear me? I asked you to stop and you're still doing it?" And he didn't stop. I sent him to a time out with the brief explanation that he wasn't listening. After time out we did the whole, "What should you say?" (sorry for __) and he couldn't even tell me what he'd done wrong. He said, Sorry for not eating? It was like he hadn't even processed the entire conversation I had with him that led to that.

- This past spring we went swimming and he went to the bathroom. When I went to check on him because he was taking awhile, I couldn't find him. We had 3 adults scouring the place calling out for him. All along he WAS in a stall, totally clueless to the world (I hadn't seen his feet underneath the stall bc he was holding them up off the floor). I asked him what he was doing - he was counting dots on the ceiling, of course. Hadn't heard anyone calling his name although we each had to have been just feet from him numerous times.

- Among these examples there are so many small ones...he still has accidents because he is playing and in the zone...he does not register a car coming down the street while everyone is yelling to "wait!" (scary!), and if he gets mad at his sibling for something and we see him wind up to hit, and catch it in time to say no, don't hit, it's like he can't help himself, he has to hit, even if it's just a tap. He had the idea so it HAS to happen.

- Practicing writing, you ask him to spell his name (which he knows how to do)... he spells the first letter. Then we say the next letter. He is already writing the first letter over and over and over again, down the line. He had already decided he wants to write that letter, did not register the 2nd instruction.

- Rough housing with his sister the other night I loudly proclaimed "That's enough! DO NOT TOUCH HER." and literally a moment later he is climbing on her. I say, "What did I just say?" --"I don't know..."

I know a lot of this also sounds like negative attention seeking behavior, and some defiance. But my main concern is that nearly every time he gets in trouble for something, he can't even tell us why he's in trouble...what happened to cause him to get in trouble. We have made sure we are VERY clear about our warning system, and our instruction on why he's in time out. Always telling him right before he goes to time out why he's going there. It's like he's not even processing our instruction or our warning not to do something or anything afterwards.

Suggestions/comments appreciated... Is this normal? I know sometimes ADHD/ADD has that, right - more like selective attention?