SS had is tonsils and adenoids removed yesterday. BF took him back to BM's yesterday evening (it's her week, he was taking care of SS while BM was busy). BF gave her all the paperwork and instructions from the doctor on what she should feed him, his pain meds, etc. He gets a text from her last night about SS and this is how the conversation went
BM: SS is eating broccoli! (like it's a good thing, and any other time it would be great, but not now)
BF: SS really needs to only be eating soft food
BM: He's not complaining. He says it doesn't hurt
BF: Yeah, because he's all hopped up on Tylenol codeine! He needs soft food
BM: He's fine, besides he's already finished eating it.
BF: He can't have food like that for at least the next 5 days.
BM: Shut up. He's fine. God you're a spaz.

BM continued to act like she could give SS whatever and he would be fine, telling BF he's overreacting. :? The aftercare instructions specifically said "no hard, coarse or scratchy foods as they may cause bleeding", I think fresh broccoli would be considered a hard food, wouldn't it? WTF, so she doesn't care that she could cause complications by ignoring the instructions? Just yesterday morning before the surgery, BM gave SS a bunch of water when he woke up when she was specifically told he was not to have ANYTHING the morning of, and then lied to the doctor about it. Her reasoning was that SS would just freak out if she didn't. Yeah, he just might, but guess what, you are the parent so DEAL WITH IT!

BF was concerned for SS so he called the doctor. He asked her if this type of food was okay for him to be eating and the doc said absolutely not. BF then asked the doctor, "could you please call BM and explain to her the instructions as maybe I haven't done an adequate job of explaining them to her", trying not to make it sound like he was "tattling" on BM. He didn't want to have to put the doc in the middle, but he felt like BM was completely disregarding what he was telling her. The doc did, and BM didn't like it.

BM: I can't believe you called the dr. You're such a spaz. SS saw me eating it and he wanted some.

Again, you are the PARENT and it is your responsibility to care for him and follow the Docs instructions regardless of what SS wants.

She went on to say that maybe SS should just stay with BF for the next week. Or maybe he should just stay with BF full time since he hates it at her house anyway (her words).

It very well may come to be that SS will be with us full time eventually. I honestly don't think she was saying this out of anger or frustration. She has been saying this more and more often, and the last time she said BF needed to take SS more she signed the paperwork to increase to 50/50 without any problems. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

I don't think BF overreacted even a little bit. He was concerned for his son's health and he made it known to her. She seemed to disregard all instructions so BF did what he could to make sure she knew what she needed to be doing for SS.

Are the "reasons" she gives for not following instructions logical to anyone else?