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apologies and forgiveness

workinthruthetoughstuff's picture

I don't even know where to start today. It's been something. I talked to BM today. She called my cell after my husband didn't answer his. She called about going to pick up SD17, but when I thought the conversation was over and I went to hang up the phone she started apologizing.

She apologized for calling. She apologized for everything that has happened over the past few years. She apologized for taking SD's word without looking for the truth. She apologized for hurting us. She asked for forgiveness.

memories

workinthruthetoughstuff's picture

With so much happening in SD17's world right now, my husband and BM have been talking quite a bit. There are a lot details and lies to figure out, but at least they are on the same page and SD is not getting away with her manipulations.
When all of this started, SD's actions brought back a lot of hurtful memories from the past. We are all working through our own pain and coming to terms with what was said too and about each of us. BM reached out to me and is looking for support. I feel for her, even though I know that she brought a lot of this on herself.

Do I call her back?

workinthruthetoughstuff's picture

I got home to a very loooooong babbling message from BM today - for me. She NEVER calls me, maybe 3 times in the past 13 years...but now she would like to talk. She apologized for believing SD17 lies over my husband and myself. She credits 'momma bear' protecting her 'cub' as justification. She wants us 'parents' to work together to get the kid back on track. She admits that by her stepping in and choosing the kid's side she has made things worse now and she is reaping the benefits. She is facing all the hurt and pain that we faced 1 1/2 years ago and is asking for support.

These days...

workinthruthetoughstuff's picture

I don't know how real the situation is, because we have not spoken much at all since SD17 left our house 1 1/2 years again. But it seems she has become unhappy in her life at BM's house and instead of finding a way to work through it she stopped eating, thus forcing a trip to the hospital and is now in a 30 day program. Less than a couple hours in the program and she has become happy as a clam, calling and texting all her friends and family about how great it is.

staying postive

workinthruthetoughstuff's picture

There are times, like today, when I wonder why people, in general, are filled with unhappiness and treat others unkindly? Every day I see people who are filled with such selfishness and negativity. Maybe it's where I live and where I work. Maybe it is the dynamic of our step-family. Maybe it is the times. Maybe it is reflective of the troubles in their own lives. I don't know.