I'm so glad I found some place to voice my opinion and have others understand my pain. It will also be great to hear other people advice and suggestions. I've talked to friends and family bout these issues but unless you've been threw this you don't get it. My mom was a step mom but being a step mom now days is so different. I have a friend I go to and she has talked me off emotional ledges, cause she knows some of the legal parts of it and is on the other side ( being the mom with a evil dad)

I never thought I would be going threw this, dealing with a BM that is just horrible to deal with no matter how much I have tried. I've tried being the middle man so she didn't have to deal with him. She would complain bout things and I would talk to my husband and we would compromise. I was always in her corner not that she would admit it now. 

BM is always bring up the divorce decree that we need to abid by it. We'll this is only brought up when it benefits her. Then when we bring it up it gets ignored and when brought up in court she for some reason comes out smelling like a rose. She is supposed to be discussing medical stuff with Dad but doesn't, makes appt and only makes them for her convenience. Then she suppose to find the most cost effective way to buy things i.e. glasses, braces..but doesn't and we have to pay out the nose for stuff. Now  since I have the better insurance I'm the one that insures the 3 skids, and if it wasn't for me they would be getting better Healthcare. Now I just feel like I'm getting taking advantage of. And she doesn't even knowledge on the skids paperwork that im the step mom but she knowledges that her fiance on the paperwork. How fair is that? Now she doesn't want the kids alone with me when my husband is taking one child to a therapy appt. The decree states if they will be gone for more then 4 hours then they have to give the other parent a chance to take them..it's about an hour in a half he's gone and im alone with them. I'm pretty sure she leaves the kids with her boyfriend and we don't say anything.  Then also has the child texting him saying he doesn't want to be alone with me..WTF? If it wasn't for me these kids wouldn't be doing fun things, they would be never going on vacations and doing random fun things. 

We already don't get the 12yr old SD cause she is a little mole in this house. She listen to conversations and goes right to mom. She was also givin the choice at 9 yrs old if she wanted to visit dad on his days. I feel this woman is so toxic. And dad doesn't have a chance at all! In or out of court. I've talked to him bout just giving up the visitations. Cause I'm sure that's what she wants. She thinks of these poor kids as cash cows! She doesn't work..lives off of child support and state aid. But once she gets married ( which I don't know what this man sees in her) she loses all the state help. Which is thrown in our face.." you know once I get married you have to pay half of stuff"  yeah well lady so will you since ur so used to getting shit for free! 

She is constantly bring up that I'm the one footing the bill on alot of stuff, well isn't that what you do when you love someone and are married?? Help them out? My husband is a paramedic and most of his check goes to child support. But BM is jealous of us cause of our relationship..we are happy we have a happy life together. We don't fight unless the kids are here or we are dealing with her BS. I'm sorry you man has his own kids to pay for and he doesn't help you out like I help my husband out. Just like most people I'd give the shirt off my back to help out. 

I'm trying so hard to be there for my husband but I feel like I'm failing, I'm being beat down.