You are here

VioletsareBlue's Blog

Stepmom Magazine

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Wed, 07/03/2013 - 12:54pm

The July issue is out: http://www.stepmommag.com/

Wednesday Martin has an article in this one and, of course, it spoke to me.

"For some twisted reason, WE EXPECT ALL WOMEN TO LOVE ALL KIDS EVERY SECOND, including kids they had no hand in raising, only met recently ... or kids with whom they have nothing at all in common beyond that shared guy—their husband/dad."

THIS is the major thing that I contend with everyday. It totally makes sense to me that we may not have "anything in common beyond that shared guy". AHA!

SD8 puts me in my place

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Thu, 06/13/2013 - 4:15pm

I told DH last weekend, "Do something about your kid (SD17)", this was in jest and everyone knew it. SD8 pipes up and said, "She's your kid too."

This was not mean or snarky or anything just a matter-of-fact thing out of an 8 year olds mouth.

I was speechless and didn't know what to say. I know she thinks of me as a "mom" and I'm OK with that, but she has never expressed it.

She will survive the disappointment

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Wed, 06/05/2013 - 12:26pm

SD17 has been planning a road trip to CA with her BFF for a couple of months.
BFF has helicopter parents (her mother would go to the high school every day to have lunch with said BFF). BFF had to push the trip back a week because she would miss her dad's birthday ( :? ). Now she told SD17 that she can't leave on the 14th because that Sunday is Father's Day (seriously??!!). BFF is telling SD17 that she doesn't think her parents will let her drive and that she should just probably fly.

Back and Forth

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Fri, 05/31/2013 - 9:44am

So over the years I've gone back and forth with SD17 and not minding her being around and then really disliking her being around and in my face all the time.
Recently (last few months), I've found it better for ME to interact with her. I don't feel like such a bitch. She was working a lot and finishing high school so she wasn't around all that much (helped a lot!).

Now she is done with high school and is around ALL THE TIME. I can't stand it. I want her OUT OF MY HOUSE! Not sure how I will get through the next couple of months when I feel annoyed when she is around. Ugh!

Just wanted to say thanks

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Fri, 05/17/2013 - 2:32pm

Thanks

I am not quite as active as I was when I first joined but I can't thank everyone enough for giving me the strength to stand up for myself, stop second guessing myself and believing in myself. There was a time when I didn't know if DH and I were going to make it because his kids had too many problems, I was filled with guilt and thought I had to be the perfect "stepmom" etc.

Things are good

VioletsareBlue's picture

Submitted by VioletsareBlue on Mon, 07/23/2012 - 3:38pm

Hello

I haven't posted in a while because I haven't needed to post about anything.

The Orc is an idiot, as usual.

DH and I split our money and the bills and it's the best decision we could have made. I feel much calmer and if he wants to spend money on the girls that I think is silly IT DOESN'T MATTER anymore. It's so free'ing!