exhausted
This has been a really exhausting skid week.
SO is mad at me, he says I'm in a bad mood today. And he's right. I am in a bad mood. I feel like this whole week I've catered to everyone, including him. He's had his head in his work or his computer or his Ipad all week, including this weekend. It doesn't bother me when it's just the two of us, but when we have SD I get emotionally exhausted and I just need more from him.
SD has woken us up almost every night this week crying. Her day care was closed Wed and Thurs so I stayed home to watch her. MIL came down and stayed Friday and Saturday. Today I feel like I entertained SD all day.
And when I get frustrated with SD SO gets mad at me. He can scream and yell at her but god forbid I explain to her that she can't change into yet another outfit because it makes more laundry for me. He called me hateful.
And while I was updating my invoices this evening (b/c I've been off most of the week) SD kept asking me the same question over and over, I told her I didn't want to think about that right now. SO got upset with me for that.
And when I finally get alone time he sends SD to see what I'm doing. Not to mention he left me with her this afternoon so he could run to best buy to get another needless electronic.
It's not SD I'm frustrated with at all, I'm getting frustrated with my SO. He has got to start helping me or something...he's just so...absent from me when we have SD. It's exhausting.
My hats off to ALL of you with more than one skid/kid. You have super human powers.
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Comments
SO needs a reality check ...
SO needs a reality check ... make plans the next time SD will be there & let him parent for a while. Then it will be time to talk about expectations.
Ugh I know... I feel like we
Ugh I know... I feel like we when get SD for our week his daily schedule doesn't change. I have no idea how he manages to sit in one spot with his Ipad all day with a 4 year old running around. Oh, because I end up doing everything that's why. When we have SD it would be nice if I felt like his schedule was impacted as well.
I was feeling really
I was feeling really overwhelmed with my newborn and my DSS recently. My DF works full time and goes to school full time as well, but most of his classes are online. It was feeling like he was not doing anything with the kids because he tknew i would. So, he had his down time and while it is well deserved, he thought i didn't need any because i'm a SAHM. with a newborn and a 6 year old.
One Saturday, as he sat down to play his xbox, I handed him our baby, told what our 6 year old was doing, and went shopping with a friend for the next 7 hours.
he now comes home, helps me finish dinner, and asks me every night if i need some time alone. sometimes men need to have almost a slap in the face for them to see how hard this job really is. theirs tends to be the role of provider, and a lot of guys see their parenting ending at that. occassionally they need a reminder.
Thank you so so much for
Thank you so so much for sharing. This is what I feel like! SO works and pays the bills, I work part time and contribute monetarily to a few things like the phone bill and cable bills. I do all those SAHM things, even when we don't have SD. But when we do I feel like I never get a break and I always see him playing online or watching tv. I hate to bring it up; once I did and he got upset. He doesn't feel like he's doing anything wrong. I just don't think he appreciates how hard this can be.
we would argue all the time
we would argue all the time about it if i did bring it up. that's why i just gave him the kids on a day i knew he had no plans and left. there was no arguing, no "conversation" that could lead to me feeling guilty.
it really has worked wonders. i suggest you try it-keep your phone on, but screen the calls (my DF likes to call me 1 million times when he's with the kids). if there's an emergency you'll get the little voicemail icon.
also, get a hobby that he can see. i've started some photography, jewelry making and painting furniture. My DF sees how happy an hour of doing something creative can make me, and he wants to encourage it. god knows he would rather have me happy and relaxed than stressed and bitchy.
My FDH used to play that game
My FDH used to play that game & I started writing little notes & sending it to FDH using the Skid as a "mail runner"...I did this when FDH would send them to me for the what-have-yous of the day. The Skid had NO idea what was going on and thought it was fun. The notes consisted of varied messages from "your daughter REALLY needs your attention" to "I love you" to "pls speak to SS about focus". It has become a game now & it keeps the Skids not knowing quite whats going on.
As far as him getting angry at you...wow...if you aren't allowed to nicely tell a child that you're busy then why is he allowing you to watch her? Even a nanny or day care provider would need to be able to speak to a child in that manner...
and why can't so take sd to
and why can't so take sd to best buy for father daughter time? why is he acting like archie bunker?