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Finally DH.....finally!!!

LPS's picture

DH awoke out of his cocoon, he emerged like a butterfly....his rose colored glasses not only fell off, they shattered into a million tiny pieces!!!!! He and I had a long talk last night, even after I told him I wasn't going to say anything about the situation anymore, I just had too. I was seething inside. I told him I have known about what SD has been doing for SO long and it has been eating me up inside. I asked him to ask SD what she and the bf have been doing on skype, and I hope if SD and bf break up, he isn't embarrassed by SD behavior at work. (he works @ school where bf goes in a different town). He just looked at me, got up when in SD room and took away her computer. He told her she will not be seeing him anymore. Her response was, "we aren't doing anything" he just looked at her and said, "i know what your doing, you can text him and talk on the phone but that's it, your too young and I don't like any of this."

We spoke about how SD should be tested for herpes, I told him, SD said her bf never kissed anyone before her, so she probably got it from someone else and gave it to him. He agreed. He and I both agree SD should be on BC but not the pill because she is so irresponsible. I told him, SD may be complaining that a shot hurts but pushing a baby out hurts even more. I reminded him how we didn't want any children and that's why I had my tubes tied. I told him if SD gets pregnant, she will have to live with her mother because I refuse to raise her baby. He agreed. He asked me what he's supposed to do now, I told him SD CANNOT go to bf house anymore, if she wants to see him, his mother can drive him here and they can hang out with her door open and if not when DH and I go out on the weekends she can stay home alone. I am going away tomorrow morning, I told him this weekend SD will either stay home or go out with him. He doesn't want SD with him right now, he is sickened by her. Not to be a bitch, but that makes me happy! I told him SD has to much leeway and she needs to have more structure in her life. She's been doing what she wants for the 3 years she has been living with us and DH needs to stop trying to be the "cool dad". Then he said he thinks SD is mad at him, I said Good. He said he doesn't know what to say to her right now and what should he do. I said he didn't have to do anything or say anything, that's the joys of being a parent, you make the rules. He did it by taking away her computer and telling her NO for the very first time in the 9 years I know him, he finally told her NO. WTG DH!! Now hopefully, he will follow through and not listen to and believe SD lies.

I shall keep you all posted. Thanks for holding me above the water these last few days. With your help, I have not drowned.... Smile

Comments

Doubletakex3's picture

What most guilty or disney dads fail to realize is that kids genuinely want good parenting. Both my SDs at different times (one when she was 16 and the other most recently who's 11) have commented about their friends' parents and how awful they are at parenting. In the moment, kids may hate discipline and structure but need and want it. SD11 even said, "So & so doesn't have to do any chores at all. How is she ever going to be able to take care of herself when she grows up? Is her grandmother & dad going to come over and clean her apartment?"

PeanutandSons's picture

I hope the glasses stay off. My Dh has had the glasses fall off a few times, but they always end up right back on.

LPS's picture

Thank you Smile

I was just thinking that she doesn't have internet access on her phone to send pics to boyfriend but then I realized she has the ipod touch which she can facetalk on as well as send sexy pics. I will have to keep my eyes open. I know she locks the ipod but I will make her unlock it and look at it if need be and I would hope DH realizes it as well.

asheeha's picture

try to get dh to be the one to make her unlock it and periodically look at it! really, she will take it better if it comes from him. she will resent you longer for doing stuff like this then she will him.

asheeha's picture

Good for you for sticking to your guns! Smile

I know my step parents knew loooooong before my bios when I was doing something I shouldn't. I hope he continues to listen to you. Maybe he should take a parenting class to help him learn how he should be!

And I just have to say I love your first sentence. -----> DH awoke out of his cocoon, he emerged like a butterfly.... Smile