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Am I wrong?

LPS's picture

Tell me, if I'm wrong because right now I'm pissed at my DH. DH took SD to a wake tonight and his XW was there, he was telling me when he saw her, she was crying and he gave her a hug. He told me her husband, looked away, like he didn't want to see it. I gave DH a dirty look and said he was probably pissed, I would've looked away too.

He told me he hugged her after I had asked him what he was wearing, he looked kinda nice, he told me he looked "fly".

So he made himself look "fly" as he says and he hugged his ex wife. WTF is that about?

Comments

LPS's picture

You're right, I would dress up but the fact that he hugged this woman, I'm so annoyed. I don't even want to look at him or talk to him.

3familiesIn1's picture

I wouldn't want my XH to touch me with a 10 foot pole - just saying.... The thought of my XH hugging me, ick, he is the last person I want to comfort me...

AndSoItIs's picture

I agree with stepaside about the ego stuff, and I am insane and crazy when it comes to jealousy, and I admit it's immature but I am fine with that being a part of my personality. To me, and DH and I have discussed this and we're both of the same thought. Cheating is breaking the rules. Period. Some rules don't need to be spelled out in black and white. Would I hug an ex in this situation? Sure wouldnt, not in front of my husband or otherwise. Would he hug his? Nope, and if he would he certainly wouldn't in front of me because well, its a matter of respect. I doubt your DH would've hugged her in front of you. Why? Bc it's disrespectful. Some people are going to disagree with me, and this is just my opinion but yeah. I'd probably be packing my shit in a fit of rage, and heading out.

Lalena75's picture

I always make sure I look good when I see my ex, as a reminder to him that I'm better off now without him, if I were to publicly hug him it would be for 1 of 2 reasons. A genuine hug of sympathy for the loss of one of his parents, aunts or uncles or sibling (he was a sucky person to me but no one wants to lose family) or to make him totally and completely uncomfortable.

smdh's picture

Amen! My dh would never hug her, though. He doesn't even look at her when she speaks to him. She told him once that her dad was in the hospital, he said "see ya" and got in the car and drove away.

WellandTruly...'s picture

'After I deloused him & sprinkled him with Holy water I would punish him severely.'

- Hilarious Biggrin

ms.blessed.n.distressed's picture

:jawdrop: My DH would be in major shit if he hugged bm. The only time he better hug her is if something happened to their son and even then idk. What did he say when you told him it pissed you off? Does he normally act this way towarda BM. Not necessarily hugging her, but is he there for her in situations that do not concern him or their kids what so ever?

LPS's picture

DH just doesn't get it. He keeps telling me to get over it. I think this weekend when my kids go to their father, I will pack my bags and go away for the weekend and distance myself from him. Then he can see how I'm getting over it.

LPS's picture

DH told me he hugged her because everyone was hugging. I asked him if everyone was kissing would he have kissed her too, his response-"there goes our nice weekend" wth does that mean? To me, that means yes, he would. why else would he feel our weekend would be ruined because he knows if he were to truthfully answer me the shit would hit the fan. I could throw up right now, I feel so disrespected and stupid.

LPS's picture

he said it didn't mean anything but I still cant get past it. She is just such an evil pos. She has no relationship with SD, she has caused so much grief and aggravation to SD and DH and a few months ago she punched me in the face. So knowing all that and the type of person she is,,,, the whole thing is eating at me.

PracticingPatience's picture

I would be super pissed for sure, and would most likely react exactly how you did. However, I think it only gives BM more power to let her 'ruin your weekend'. I hate it when my DH says that line to me in the middle of an argument 'oh, there goes our weekend'. How about 'honey, I'm sorry, I don't want this to ruin our weekend'. I hate to sound like a man-basher, but men really can be clueless sometimes. They are wired differently than women. Of course, there are exceptions and some are much more sensitive regarding things like this. But 90% of men would probably just give a hug without even thinking about it, AND think it was no big deal at all.

LPS's picture

The only part of me that would want to touch my ex husband would be my hands, pushing him in front of an on coming semi-truck!

New second wife-step-mom's picture

LOL! Me too. But I do have a few old boyfriends or guys from work... UMMMM...

New second wife-step-mom's picture

I agree with Newwife3. The best way for a man to "get it" sometimes is let them be on the receiving end and see how it feels. Do you have an EX you can hug? Whether it be EX dh, so or just an old guy friend. Try to fix it up and let him see how it feels.

magnummom's picture

It would hurt me for my husband to hug anyone who just punched me in the face a few months ago! I can't belive he did this. It's super ridiculous. I'm sorry honey.