SD downloading large programs onto my computer without permission...
HI, I haven't written in a while, I have just been reading. Things have been reasonably tame here for a while. Until last night, when I started to try and figure out why my work computer was running so slowly. Now, this is the only computer in the house, and it doesn't even belong to me, it belongs to my company. It is supposed to be used for work only, but I let the kids use it as long as they ask and tell us exactly what websites they are going to. My BD respects this, and has never broken the rule, knowing how important this computer is to this family. So last night, I am checking out all the programs that are installed on my computer to see if I can eliminate any and I run into several that were downloaded a few months ago, all with names that I recognize from my SD talking about. I asked BD about the programs and she didn't know what they were, except for one, that she remembered SD talking about as well. I obviously deleted all the programs and talked to DH about it. Now, SD, about a year ago, had been banned from using her own computer (yes, she has her own at her house) for quite some time when she was signing her mother up for all kinds of mailing lists. She has been extensively talked to about proper useage of a computer, particularly mine, and at 11 yrs. old, I think she is old enough to understand these things. So my DH's response to this last night is, "Well, she is only a kid, she doesn't understand about things like that." I couldn't believe he acted like it was such a minor issue! She knows this is my work computer, and we have explained to her many times that one virus could knock it out, and it would be my work down the drain and my dollar to fix or replace the computer for the company, not to mention how it would look to my boss if something like this happened. My 8 yr. old daughter was appalled that SD would do this, she spouted all of the reasons it was wrong like she had memorized them for years, so how can DH say that an 11 yr. old is too young to understand? I think we need to have some serious consequences for SD doing this, DH doesn't think so, what should I do here? Obviously, she cannot use the computer anymore, but is that enough?
Advice appreciated.
- lcooper's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
only a kid
"Well, she is only a kid, she doesn't understand about things like that." That's the reason that so many parents are part of the problem and not part of the solution. They continuously make excuses for their kds regardless of the seriousness of the event.
Is banning her from the
Is banning her from the computer enough? I would also give her a couple of extra chores for the week, just to make sure the point got through.
If she understands how to download a program, she's old enough to understand the rule to not do it. So I agree with you that DH is taking this a bit chavalier. I mean it's not the end of the world and thank goodness no damage is done, but yeah, I'm with you. A stern discussion and extra consequences should be applied to the SD.
Good luck, I know how precious the puters are, especially when work is so gracious to provide one.
UMmm...
I'm sorry... but this pc is not yours in the first place- it's proprietary equipment owned by your employer, therefore, the kids- regardless if they 'follow the rules' or not- should not be using it period. Second, in general, unless it's a small family run company you work for, most corporate offices have tracking software installed on the pc itself that you won't be aware of- doesn't show up in the program files, etc. And if damage is done to the pc, you might be held accountable for the repairs... or replacement... or lose your job. Be careful with this. (I have several friends who work "telecommuting") It's just better not to let the kids use this pc, period. Got an older pc laying around? Fix it up, let them use that one... save yourself the trouble of viruses, and such!
(In fact, I just got a new laptop, I reformatted the old laptop, and now that is the kids to use, and I don't have to worry about mine getting messed up.)
However, if you are going to allow them to use it, I would make user profiles, set a password for the Main account (which is yours) and make it the only administrative account. All other profiles should be restricted profiles, and I would not go making a profile for everyone, just make one profile for all the kids to use/share- call it Family. There are also some programs you can use to lock out downloading of unwanted software. Depending on your OS (XP, Vista, etc... you may have parental control already on it.) If not, I strongly suggesting using programs such as Windows System Locker, Cyber Sitter, Net Nanny, etc...
I also would periodically run several utilities on your pc on a regular basis, such as Norton Systemworks, or Windows Live OneCare, or use PC Pitstop... which is one of my favorite places to visit. You can run a through scan of your pc, and they will make recommendations to optimize it, fix it, etc based on your system results.
I'm not going to address your frustrations with your DH in regards to his response... because simply, if you allow them free access, they are going to push the boundaries, and basically you enable them. After all, this is "your" pc, not your DH's to control...
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...
Thanks stepmom!
For all your tips. I will use some of those utilities, and yes, the skids are now banned from the computer. Though I cannot ban my daughter from it, it is the only one we have, no old ones laying around either. My BD is a bit of a computer whiz and uses it often for school projects and such. She has her her own user account, which they were all supposed to use, but my SD was apparently using mine. I am saving up to get a "kids" computer, it just hasn't been doable up to this point. As for the skids having had access to it before, we were trying to be fair since my BD is allowed use, and honestly, they were old enough, I thought, to be trusted. Obviously, that was a mistake.
Thanks to all for advice!
When it comes to my stuff
I mean things I purchase or have purchased with my money, (we have completely separate accounts) husband or SS can use but only if they have the money to replace it (immediately) if they break it.
Same goes the other way and for my own grown kids. I don't touch other people's cars/computers etc because if I were to break it, I WOULD PAY FOR IT.