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Thanks- headed back to my life...

KK_8's picture

Submitted by KK_8 on Tue, 02/22/2011 - 10:42pm

A little farewell to all at StepTalk...

Thank for everything!!!

... I was thinking I might stay here a while, but after reading all of your responses here, and letting them settle in, I think I have already accomplished everything here that I could, and staying longer will only cause me to bring more negativity up to the surface, and not in a constructive way. I appreciate the support and advice I have received from many of your replies and messages. Some of your stories were amazing, and even heartbreaking. I hope this site is everything you need it to be, and at some point you are able to leave it all together. I really do hope you all find your own peace with your situations. I will be out there working toward mine!

Who knows- I may come back at some point, but for now.... I'm out! (except for a few goodbyes on the way out)

Take care everyone! And don't forget the Serenity Prayer- it's cliche but that probably still is one of the simplest and wisest sayings I've ever come across.

Love,
KK

P.S. I will be deleting a lot of what I have posted thus far, but not without first saving all in a word document- that way I can read over some of your comments again. There were some good gems in there that I don't want to forget

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"The family - that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor, in our inmost hearts, ever quite wish to." ~Dodie Smith

Comments

Alison12345's picture

Submitted by Alison12345 on Thu, 02/24/2011 - 6:24am

I've posted a couple comments/opinions on your previous posts but mostly I've just been a 'lurker' and have read everything you've written.

Your insight as a step-child who is now an adult has been eye-opening for me and has really helped me see things from my own step-child's perspective and for that; I thank you.

I love my children (all of them; whether I've given birth to them or not) and truly believe in my heart that everything I do is my attempt to guide them along the way to becoming happy, successful, independent adults.

But...I'm not perfect. None of us are; really. Our parents made mistakes and so will we. Unfortunately, children don't come with a manual. If they did, we wouldn't need these sites!

Reading your posts has made me aware that I can't forget to remind my step-child of just how much I DO love him; even on the hardest days where it seems like I'm 'on him' a lot. It has made me understand that he goes through things like being pulled in different directions of feelings between two families which can be very confusing for a child.

If I can help you on your way out, I will share this. What you're going through right now is normal. We all reach an age where we examine our childhood under a microscope but once you've gone through it, you will emerge with a better understanding of why things were the way they were. Although, I'm not sure you can fully grasp it until you have children of your own and have gone through the terrible two's...lol. Until my child pulled a temper tantrum in line at a department store, I remember smugly thinking, "I will NEVER lose my temper with MY child!" lol

I believe I wrote this in a previous post but...I encourage you to talk to your step-mom. If you approach her in a non-confrontational way, explain that lately you've been thinking a lot about your childhood and would love to hear her 'take' on things; it might open the floodgates, so to speak, and you might reach that point of understanding and dare to hope; a bonding connection. One thing that I think step-children need to be told is this; you can love us both (step and real mom).

I wish you luck...