For the most part SO is a very good dad, he helps with homework, keeps up with their teachers and school stuff, he disciplines, and plays outside with them. He makes sure they're clean, healthy, and that they pick up and helps with their laundry.
None of that would likely be true if he had started to get regular time with them without me in the first place, but it's because I have older kids and led by example he hated getting a "weird look" when he didn't do something or did something off parent-wise apparently myself and my kids would look at him like he grew two heads. He changed tactics and takes my advice. When he doesn't I try to let the chips fall where they may unless it directly affects myself, my kids, or my house. He usually ends up switching he choice and sometimes he doesn't and it works out. His kids are already so much better off than 2 years ago just because he has them way more often. They're good kids just super needy because of their BM ignoring them and pawning them off on her family. I think every parent has their Disney parent moments I'm just glad his are rare and usually a reward for good things.

Mine has. The SDs were given to us via a change in custody and have really improved, and sadly, bm has faded out of their lives.

While our marriage comes first, I know my dh loves his kids more than life itself. If I had bios, I'm sure I would too.

When they came over EOW it was he11. Dh didn't parent them. But his not parenting them was the least of their problems.

DH is a good dad for the most part. He really tries hard to maintain consistency when kids are with us. The hardest thing for EOW parents is the tendency to slip into being indulgent.

I have heard the justification:

"I only have them 4 days of the month, I don't want to spend that time being completely disciplinarian"

And in one side I can see his perspective, however my answer was:

"If children are getting no rules and regulations for the other 26 days of the month when are they going to learn the values that you want them to have as adults? By indulging them on your 4 days you are basically teaching them that they can do whatever they want, whenever they want with no consequences"

This sort of made him think, and he realised that at least one parent has to be consistent with their parenting and what kind of behaviour was expected from them. And he realised that parent had to be him...

Almost 4 years down the line both kiddies know; at Dad's & Cornflower's the rules never change... We expect good behaviour; manners; and respect for the whole family. If you don't you pay the piper.

In the beginning my step children always looked to daddy when they wanted or were doing something they shouldn't, now my step children have started to look at me when daddy goes all soft; because they know that the rules don't change no matter what. And they know they are overstepping...