Hi All,

I originally thought that this blog was going to be titled, "SD9 is improving" but as I sat down to write this, I noticed on the window where my DD's 3 &5 scribble on with window crayons: "I hate..." and then in very small letters...my name! Sigh. I would take this more to heart if it wasn't so obviously a cry for help. BM took off to home state and is living with grandparents now and left behind SD9 and SS13; SD9 seems to be blaming me for the event (can't put it together in my own head, but it works in hers; easier to hate me than to blame her mom or dad, I suppose). I still maintain that she is a fine young person, although has the potential bi-polar troubles that her mom has. One thing that is good about what I will now call "the graffiti incident" is that DH is going to get an eyeful in the morning. I have tried many times to gently talk to him about her "dislike" of me...which is now glaringly emblazened on my window in yellow crayon! Time for him to face the music, (or print) as it were, and agree to deal with it.

Two other funny things that may have inspired "the incident": she spent the night at a friends house last Saturday, and went to church with her the next morning, where the children's sermon was...wait for it..."Respecting your elders even though you may not like them." She tells me this while we're waiting at the bus stop, and I must say, it made me laugh. The other thing yesterday was yet another story from my DD5 about SD9's less than spectacular behavior, eating her lollipop when DD5 when to the bathroom (I know, shocking). I was patting myself on the back for how I handled it...Me: "So (SD9) what happened this afternoon with the lollipop?" SD9:"What lollipop...did she have a lollipop...there was no lollipop...she went with daddy right after we came home from school...did she say I ate it??" Whoops, it was going well until the last part. I was super calm the whole time, and I didn't really respond after the last part (and I certainly didn't lead her in that direction from the open-ended question). She also didn't get to speak with her mom last night, so, all things added up end in...graffiti.

Of course, there is beginning to be a pattern here of lying, and general bossiness to her SS's, which could spiral downwards. I think the window scratchings will help us to help her put things into perspetive, and also to help encourage my DH to get her to a therapist. More later.