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Tax Question - Nosy BM - UGH

fractioned's picture

Steplife should come with a disclaimer that says "be prepared for all hope of privacy to go out the window".

My DH has something in his CO that seems a little atypical and I can't seem to find any information about it. I'm wondering if any of you have seen or had to deal with something similar.

The order basically says that in order to determine who claims my SS, both DH and BM have to run their numbers and whomever gets the most benefit from claiming him does, and has to cut a check to the other for half. There's a form for calculating this provided by the state.

Now, DH and I are filing jointly for the first time this year. I've always filed the EZ form for myself in the past, so I'm not used to itemizing and all that jazz so DH has been taking care of it this time around. We ran our numbers as filing separately first and the refunds were far smaller, and with a baby on the way we need to get as much back as we can so filing jointly is just what we need to do.

Here's where I have an issue: today DH is getting everything prepped to file, and BM calls. She wants to review OUR return, according to DH in order to "make sure he didn't fudge it" or something like that. WTF is she an IRS auditor? I'm completely uncomfortable with this, but she shows up almost immediately and DH just lets her right on in there. I'm upstairs, stunned and angry - no chance to begin to react - and then I hear her comment that his effing turbotax password is different. UGH!

How is anything but the refund amount any of her business?
Is she going to get more back from us because my income is included?
Does she really have the right to do this?

Comments

almost.ready's picture

Ummm..... If she has this much control over him now, think about how things will be in the future. She will always be looking at your personal business, and DH will allow it. I would have gone down and kicked her ass out! Also, you should out a stop to that ASAP. She is not married to him, therefore has no reason to discuss YOUR finances.

What it seems she is doing is actually just trying to find out about your finances. Using her child as an excuse.

fractioned's picture

Knowing BM, I don't think she was after my SSN to go use it for fraud. She may have been interested in my income but more as a curiosity (she's OH SO CURIOUS about everything) than to try to do anything with the information. There's no CS in place currently and I don't think she's dumb enough to try going to file for it at this point, not that my income would come into that.

I really need to look at the wording of the CO again. I can't imagine that the court would specify that anyone has the right to review anyone else's return prior to filing, just knowing how often fraud happens. Especially after the parties are both remarried.

My gut tells me that DH just let her do it because she asked, he somehow thinks it's fair, and he doesn't care because she always did the taxes when they were married anyway. He tells me that he gets to review hers as well. I wonder what would happen if I asked to be in on that one!

Just another example of him rolling over for BM and apologizing to me later, just because it's easier.