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Legal advice

DarkStar's picture

SO and I have broken up, but I gave him a list of my "must haves" in order for me to continue our relationship. I love him and miss him a lot.
This list includes:
1. Getting custody and child support legally settled
2. Take care of old medical collections so his credit improves
3. Fix up his house to be ready to sell

#1 is truly the most important to me. Quick background....SO and BM divorced and live in Iowa, SO did not get an attorney (stupid). The CO originally was 50/50 with SO paying a couple grand in child support each month (3 skids). BM moves 2 hours away with skids in violation of the CO. SO does NOTHING about this. He gets the skids every weekend and lowers his CS to $500/month. BM is OK with all of this. A year later she calls SO and asks him to take the kids cuz she "can't deal with them." SO gets the skids full time and has had them for almost 3 years. Skids visit BM every weekend or so. BM pays no child support.

SO needs to get his CP status taken care of through the courts and make sure that BM can't get back child support. There is a chance that BM will be cooperative and agree to all this. Is there a way that SO can take care of the paperwork himself without getting an attorney as long as BM agrees to everything?

Also, someone had mentioned a blog or site for legal advice for Dad's, does anyone know what that is?

Comments

furkidsforme's picture

Wait... wasn't this dude really horrible to you and you wanted out? Don't go back. Just don't. If it is bad enough to leave just stay gone. If he was gonna fix it, he WOULD HAVE ALREADY.

amber3902's picture

The legal site is DadsDivorce.com. But your SO will need to post on there not you. They are very anti-woman on that site and if you post on there they will tell you to stop posting and have your BF post.

#1 will take a long time. Even if BM agrees to everything and agrees not to sue for back child support, he will need an attorney. There is always a chance a judge will award her back child support even if BM doesn't ask for it.

All three of your conditions involve money, so these things may take quite some time to get taken care of.

DarkStar's picture

Furkids, no, he wasn't horrible to me, it's all the BS baggage that he hasn't taken care of. I'm NOT going back now, I'm really not. I told him that if he gets his shit taken care of then there is a chance we could get back together, but he really should be doing this stuff for his KIDS, not for me.

And yes, I hear you Ripley, I was thinking the same thing myself this morning......I'm just going to give him a TINY nudge and see if he moves.

Thanks for the site Amber, yes, I remember the "no women" rule, LOL.

I'm not backing down, I'm not. He wanted to know what he needed to do to get me back and I told him. I also told him that this year will be a very telling year as words don't mean jack, ACTIONS do.

Cop_Mom's picture

***Also replied to in my Cop_Mom Blog***

After reading your blog post, I don't have any Law Enforcement related advice, however, I would suggest your SO take care of business ASAP. He can have a consultation with an attorney to get an idea of what their advice is and then attempt to handle the matter himself by filing paperwork through the court on his own.

I would suggest though that is BM is not 100% willing to sign and agree to everything, you should get a lawyer. My own DH screwed up big time in his CO previously by doing nothing when CO was not followed or agreed to stupid stuff that later turned around to bite him in the butt. He realized within the last year that is he had taken care of business immediately when he should have when certain things were happening, he would have FULL CUSTODY of his kids now and wouldn't be going through a lot of the crap he is dealing with in regards to BM.