Are you freakin' kidding me???
:jawdrop:
So, today my brother comes in from hanging out in the yard with my husband whose two children I do 150% of the parenting of. (That is 100% on bio mom's part because meth, alcohol, and seeing as many willies as possible is more important to her, and 50% on his part because he is a busy man who owns his own business.) I don't have any children of my own and when his ex-wife decided she wanted to sign her kids away at a UPS store, I willingly jumped into her shoes. Well, not hers, but a real mother's. Anyway, I have no job, no friends, no life of my own. All I do is wait hand and foot on my husband and his extremely ungrateful little brats. But here is the issue. My brother asks him when they are going to go fishing. He has the nerve to say "When we aren't running a daycare." while I'm slaving my ass off over a hot meal for all 7 people to sit and wolf down. So, my brother says, "I'll tell them we are going, I can run faster than them.". My husband says "Phh... good luck with that!" For two and a half years, I have spent more time with his children than he and his ex-wife combined!!!!He has never had to ask me to go anywhere that he wanted to and I have never refused to watch his children for him. How the f dare he??? And he wonders why I am not as enthusiastic anymore about doing things for him and his kids. He wonders why I no longer cook three meals a day every day and why I don't even want to get out of bed in the morning? He wonders why I no longer refer to them as "our children"... uh because I am reminded every day that they are not my children. I am just the nanny with benefits. What would I want to get up and slave away for when that is the kind of appreciation I get? Oh, but if you ask him, he appreciates what I do because he says "Thank you" at every meal and forces his children to give me a "Thank you" that is just as forced and feelingless as his.
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I know this feeling as well.
I know this feeling as well. I tried discussing with dh tonight the difficulty with step parenting and letting go of hurts when skids say those awful things, when bios are able to hit a reset. Missteps don't have that reset. He didn't get it, said I'm being too sensitive. Maybe your ungrateful brats would stop being so hateful if I went on strike then!!!
Oh we've talked... many, many
Oh we've talked... many, many times. You know how it goes though, if you've never felt it, it is very hard to understand and men sometimes don't even understand things they have felt. I just wish he could walk in my shoes for one day. He says I completely misunderstood his comment. And this time, he actually has a logical explanation of why I misunderstood but every time he gets caught saying something like this, he always reverts back to "a communication barrier between the North and South". I'm from all over the Midwest and Northwest, he is from as South as South can get. So, that excuses everything. This time though, he says that it was my brother who was talking crap saying he was just going to come in and lay down the law with his wife and I, and my husband's good luck comment was more toward my brother like, "good luck hobbling out after you have your limbs torn off for talking to them like that". This I can believe so I guess I over reacted on this one. oops. Stepcop.... I've gone on strike before, it works!!! Especially since their dad doesn't believe in anything extra that most kids get so any treats or fun that they get comes from me. One time I overheard my SD tell my SS, "Mommy's right. S(me) IS a b*tch and T (my mom) is, too!" because we were making her fold and put away her clothes (the only chore or responsibility that my skids have in this house even though they are 13 and 10). So I told her, I'm a b*tch huh? Well if T and I are such b*tches, you don't want anything b*tches gave you so let's start packing everything out. I made her remove every single item from her room that my mom or I had provided her. When we were finished she had three ratty shirts and a pair of shorts that did not fit her and a handful of measly crappy little toys. No bed, no dresser, no anything. I pointed out that that is all her mom had allowed her dad to have for her even though her mother never worked so everything really belonged to him and the children. Because when her mom left she took everything and sent dad only a small box of clothes, most of which did not fit, to be split between the two children. My husband found SD a sleeping bag that was theirs from before I came along. She slept on the floor with only that sleeping bag for four days before she came to me and said, "S, I'm sorry. I don't think mommy is right and I don't think you are what I said." Victory, sweet victory. Try it some time. It is very liberating. haha