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SS shares with me bc he can't w SO

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Sat, 05/24/2014 - 6:11pm

I'm glad SS8 can talk to me about his BMs step children. But I get tired of hearing about them. Every time he and I are alone he wants to talk about them and his mom. I think it's because SO isn't very positive when he mentions them. I'm very positive and just listen. I'm sure the kid feels left out as BM disappeared to the other side if the country again w two kids. That she's been living w kids that aren't him. I really wish I could punch her in the face for getting his hopes up and even bothering to try to be part of his life for a few months after not for years and years.

everyone has a damn opinion

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Fri, 05/23/2014 - 9:55am

So SO, SS8, and I have been doing great since early/mid April. I officially moved in last week.

BM has gone back to rock she crawled out from and didn't call on Mother's day, hasn't called, SS8 hasn't asked about her or asked to call her. HAAAAAAAAA Good bye worthless BM!

We celebrated mother's day with my mom (crazy borderline) and my sister-in-law, niece and brother. That all went well. SS and I had made a tye dye cake for them for their May birthdays. We've been attending family events AS A FAMILY.

Need advice

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Tue, 05/06/2014 - 3:07pm

SS8 isn't being mean but it is very annoying to me ...
I don't know what to do about it or how to correct him.
Examples :

Today grandpa is staying with us for two days. While SS was with his grandma this weekend I bought some flowers to plant and some flower bulbs. I was talking to grandpa about the flowers. SS interrupts to say "oh yeah dad is only planting flowers no vegetables this year. He's planting flowers and bought some (blah blah blah blah)"

Loving SS today...

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Wed, 04/30/2014 - 6:07pm

Well sort of he got to decide whether or not to spend time w bitchy wife of friend and their kids and us this weekend or go with his super sweet grandma to play w horses. He picked grandma and horses I would too she's a sweetheart. He also told SO he's not crazy about going to our community happy hours on Fridays. Good me either bc those bitchy people are there. We know the difference between dramatic crazies and nice ppl. Ha. He's going to help me bake a cake for my mom and sister in laws birthdays /Mother's Day.

O/T emotion worksheets and victims

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Wed, 04/30/2014 - 9:50am

A Domestic Violence and torture victim I've been helping for a little over a year called me yesterday to talk. She called b/c she didn't know what else to do and her BF was out of town. We talked for about an hour and half. I was glad she called. She is all over the place and probably manic, suffering from PTSD and a host of other crap.

today makes 4 weeks no fight

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Tue, 04/29/2014 - 3:06pm

Today makes 4 weeks without a fight btwn SO and I.

He and I have had calm adult discussions where we both listened and respectfully talked through a situation but no new fights.

He has calmed himself down, made time for us...lots of time, is more considerate, has been more in control of SS and not treating him like a baby. He's put more boundaries around our time together and cut out a lot of time with toxic people.

Things are looking good at the moment.

no sleep from thinking someone broke in it was SS being crazy

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Mon, 04/28/2014 - 10:30am

I couldn't sleep Saturday night. Got 3 hours of sleep. SS woke up trying to unlock our bedroom door. I go out the bedroom and our front door is open and unlocked, no sign of him. I wanted to kill him he's eight. He's been doing this kind of thing for attention. He hasn't done it in a while until tonight. He has woken up a few times, one time I found him upstairs and very directly and calmly told him "you need to go to the bathroom. if you are done you need to go back to bed." (that happened about two times recently.

bitchy wife of friend

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Fri, 04/25/2014 - 1:00pm

in a few blogs back I talk about a wife of one of SO's long term friends from college. The guy, who's actually his friend is a sweetheart and his wife might as well be on a real housewives show.

SO has been limiting his contact with them since she said some very disrespectful things to me for about the 5th time but was more direct and obviously intentional THIS time even for the socially disabled ... (SO sometimes) She also feels the need to call SS and SO her "boys" "I just care about my boys, just looking out for my boys" BARF

Moving part 2

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Submitted by bluehighlighter on Tue, 04/22/2014 - 7:41am

SO and I talked last night. He agrees that two months from now if we are still doing well and checking in with each other about our progress of our own issues then end of June sounds good. He said he feels confident that we will have continued to build a sturdier foundation. He also acknowledged that working on ourselves is not something that just stops after 2 months. It's a life time of making positive changes, being better people for ourselves and each other. We had a pretty productive talk.

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