Auteur's Blog
Update On Photo Opp and Creative Ideas
Thanks everyone for the ideas!!!
I haven't shown the photos to GG yet b/c yesterday he had to attend a funeral of a 57 year old vendor who died suddenly from a heart attack shortly after Christmas. Very sad, but it got GG in a "wistful" mood; and that's all I needed was more of him thinking about how "short life is" and the subsequent meandering about going back to disney daddy days.
I'll show it to him tonight along with the two oldest HORRENDOUS grades (VD's was absolutely catastrophic) but of course "grades don't matter" to him. :sick:
I'll keep you posted!!
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Ladies I need Creative Ideas!
What to say when GG starts ooing and ahing over his homely children. The Behemoth sent a set of photos that she had done for Christmas. The only one that looks nice and natural is the oldest, Brainiac SS15. Of course Brainiac is GG's least fav of all three. He holds a special place in his heart for the younger two demon spawn, VD (SD13) and Prince Hygiene (SS to be 9 in less than a week)
The youngest two are quite literally SMIRKING and look like they are about to do the devil's deeds. They aren't the most attractive children either so that makes it worse.
Any ideas?
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K-TEL (dating myself) Introduces the Ultimate Collection of All Time Skid Hits. . .
Including:
"Where's MY dad?"
"Can we eat out?"
"I'm Bored!"
"What FUN things will we be doing?"
"Mom says. . ."
"I wanna go back to MOM'S!"
Who can forget:
"I want to call Mom!"
"At my Mom's we do it THIS way"
"Dadddddddeeeeeeeeeeeee??!!"
"I can't find it"
"Yuck I won't eat it/Yuck I don't like it!"
"Can't flush this"
And the timeless:
"Where are my clothes?"
"Where are my socks?"
"Where are my shoes?"
"Spongebob/ICarly's On!"
"What are you doing?"
Just in Time for Post Christmas Shopping--Eau De Skid
New Perfume!!! Eau De Skid!!
For those SMs whose skids have PASed out and you actually miss the variety of sensory delights that is stepmotherhood.
Eau De Skid has a heady topnote of sugary urine at the precipice of diabetic coma; combined with an assertive middle note of rotting chocolate milk and a base of fossilized McDonald's french fries. Hints of halitosis are woven subtlely throughout.
At $5 an ounce it's a STEAL!!
Stepdad in Trouble for not being a "yes man" to Skids
Ahhh stepfamily relations hit a new low over a peanut butter ball!!
Too bad photos of stepson aren't on here:
http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2011/dec/27/peanut-butter-ball-dispute-se...
Of course if stepdad was a guilty biodad and allowed his heathens to eat the peanutbutter balls, I could see the frustration over the classic double standard.
More Craptacular Old School "Blended Family" Advice
HURL ALERT!!!!
With lots of "poor divorced adult children of guilty dad's" pity.
http://bangordailynews.com/2011/12/19/living/blogs-and-columns-living/di...
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Brakes Going--Ride up to See Awesomeson off to AF with his GF--cool Motel 6 Room 39.99 Overnight away from GG--PRICELESS!
Ok the brake job that GG did a few months ago seems to be waning. SOOOO I can't possibly ride up separately in my car to Niagara Falls NY to see Awesomeson off to the AF on 1/2/12.
My plan is to spring it on GG at the last moment that instead, I'll ride up with his GF who will be staying overnight on the base with Awesomeson; I'll get a room at Motel 6 for 40 bucks and a NIGHT OFF from GG!!!
Well this PROVES I'm a Bad Parent!!
Obviously Peg (my grown biodaughter) felt comfortable enough in front of GG to reveal some naughtiness as kids and so did Awesomeson.
Of course GG was DROOLING with INTRIGUE!!! Yep, Peg admitted that one time she FAKED A STOMACHACHE to get out of going to church.
That's it folks.
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My Grown Biodaughter "Peg" Always had a Built in BS Detector. . .
And it wasn't more evident than over the Christmas holiday. She and her hubby showed up. . .just before she left she took a group photo of everyone, setting the camera on "automatic"
There was Awesomeson and his GF, Peg and her hubby, and me and GG.
She posted the photo on her FB account and labeled everyone's name in the photo EXCEPT for GG!!
I think deep down she knows that GG only cares for his FIRST FAMILY!!
"Deck the Halls with Christmas Manipulation. . .Fa la la la la"
So a SECOND Xmas card comes in exclusively from PASed out Prince Hygiene who will turn nine in a few days (hint, hint, wink, wink) :sick: :si