Long time lurker on the site, finally created a membership because this is too much.  

I've been married to DH for just about 10 years now, been in 3 SK'S lives since 2011. HCBM was a tyrant in the beginning, telling anyone who would listen that **I** broke up her family and that DH had been cheating with me (not true, not true, not true).  

I am the "cool aunt" and cousin. I've always adored kids and was a popular elementary school teacher. With this sense of myself, I met DH thinking I'd get along with his kids. They were teenagers when I met them. SS24 was always kind and polite even though he would never directly look or talk to me. SD26 had problems from day one and has not stopped. DH is not the easiest and has many narcissistic traits.. life at the beginning with them was depressing and lonely for me. I stayed in the bedroom and was gone most of the day. Anyway, now, miserable and pathetic SD and I don't speak.

I married a great guy with 3 daughters. The beginning and up until recently have been great. Their dad isnt used to all the parenting. He was in the military and when he came back he was more worried about trying to save his marriage then parenting the girls simply because he didnt know how, they had/have no direction from BM. I came in we established rules. I enforced them because he wasnt home. I taught them hygiene, how to wash there hair, how often they need to shower and change their underwear. My relationship with them was great! There mother only pays attention to the oldest.