I can't keep doing this

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I try to support my husband, I really do. At first I hated the fact he had a kid, I'd had feelings for him long before he decided to knock up a 15 year old.

But right now I'm just so angry with him. I'm disappointed. I feel alone. I feel betrayed. I feel unloved and unappreciated.

I spent hours and hours helping him with all the court papers he needed. I spent a long time gathering evidence against his ex so he had some ground to stand on in court.

I supported him when he wanted a DNA test on his eldest. I found every bit of information I could, I even got details from a DNA testing facility that has been acknowledged by the government.

He wanted a baby, a family. I gave him that too, at first I wasn't ready for that. I went through hell bringing our daughter into the world.

And now hes telling me there's no dna test or court. And he doesn't understand how that makes me feel. All that work. 2 years of work. Gone. Down the drain.

I've done everything for this man, and he's given me nothing. No apology. No explanation. And now he wonders why I'm mad.

Why does depression and hormones have to make it all so much worse.

I'm confused. He knocked up a

I'm confused. He knocked up a 15-year-old? Why is there no DNA test or court?

Sounds like you've done a lot of what HE wants, and not enough of what YOU want.

Ummmm When you found out he

Ummmm When you found out he knocked up a 15yo you should have puked on his shoes then pissed on his leg as you ran away.

WTF were you thinking?

On top of that, the sterling character of a POS who knocked up that 15yo is not man enough to deal with his own child molesting bullshit and resolve it. Instead he puts it on his 2nd baby mama to deal with the results of his child sexual predator bullshit.

Leave, take your baby with you. Getting an RO to keep a child sexual predator away from your child can't possibly be that hard. He is a proven statutory rapist at best and a full blown child molesting sexual predatory scum bag at worst. Either way, he is a POS.

Save yourself and your child. Nail his ass for CS, get him on the child predators list so he can't be within hundreds of yards of a child and get on with your life.

We're 22

He was 16 at the time. His daughter is 5 almost 6

In that case, I resend my

In that case, I resend my advice as far as the consequences of child predation are concerned. This small detail up front in your post would have been helpful.

Young parenthood does not have to mean failed parenting. My DW was 16 when my SS-27 was born. She is a great mom, an amazing adult, a successful professional and a great life partner.

Your DH may also be those things. But... he needs to demonstrate it every minute of every day by putting you and your relationship first and making his child(ren) his top responsibility.

A tough thing to do. Particularly while growing himself into a responsible performing adult.

My DW did it by being a single mom while pursuing her dual major undergraduate degree and ultimately completing grad school and becoming a CPA. She and I made education a cornerstone of our commitment to each other and an example to our son (my former SS who asked me to adopt him when he was 22. We made that happen.).

You and DH take care of each other as your make a life together.... and take care of those kids.

Good luck.

OK Rags,

stop sugar coating it and tell us how you really feel! LOL

When you say he "knocked up a

When you say he "knocked up a 15-year old", I'm assuming that means that he was also 15-18 years old when he did it. My DH was 18 when my OSS was born, so I don't hold judgment on the teen parentage thing so long as your DH was *also* a teen when he engaged with someone that young.

That aside, I'd tell him exactly why you're mad. That you spent 2 years gathering all this for him, pushing yourself to be a supportive wife so that he could see his kid, taking the brunt of his likely miserable moods - basically, taking on a lot of the mental load of this so he could function. Then, after you've already broken down, he decides it's too much FOR HIM without taking into consideration everything you took on, and he's calling it all off. That's horsesh*t, and of course you get to be mad, and if he doesn't like it, then he can have a BM#2 to contend with before he reaches age 25.

It's fine if he doesn't want to pursue it any further, but he does owe you an explanation and an apology at the very least. Stop letting him make unilateral decisions that affect your life.

Why I'm mad

I have told him. Repeatedly. And he doesn't care. And yeah he was 16. But the BM slept around a lot, I went to the same school and everyone heard the same thing. Which is why he should get a dna test.

Yes, your insistance on a DNA

Yes, your insistance on a DNA test is absolutely right IMHO.

Though I never thought of that as far as my SS is concerned. The SpermIdiot was not my DW's first, but.... she never considered anything other than the Spermidiot being my SS's BioDad. SS looks just like the Spermidiot. There is no doubt about who his SpermDad is.

If there are legitimate doubs about the paternity of your Skid, your DH should make sure the test gets done. If I were married to an NCP, if there were any doubts of paternity I would insist on a test to have accurate information to protect my spouse, my family and out family financial position. As a man, the chances of this happening are pretty much slim and none.

But.... if I was in your shoes, I would be all over a paternity test.