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Hitting - What would you do?

Freedom2005's picture

Submitted by Freedom2005 on Thu, 05/05/2011 - 7:53am

Forums: 
Parenting Issues

Situation:

11 year old girl puts finger on 14 year old boy's face. 14 year old boy then hits girl's arm with a notebook hard enough to leave a red spot.

I have left out the step situation so we can try to keep a more objective view on this. As a parent, what would you do? Would they both be in trouble? Would the boy be justified in hitting since he was being touched in a personal area?

Thoughts?

alwaysanxious's picture

Submitted by alwaysanxious on Thu, 05/05/2011 - 8:00am

Not sure if a "red spot" is that serious. I'm all for kids that age working their own thing out. If they are really hurting each other then step in.
Maybe she'll leave her hands off him now.

Freedom2005's picture

Submitted by Freedom2005 on Thu, 05/05/2011 - 8:05am

Yes yes.... I agree with you both! He did have a right to defend himself, but I still think hitting was the wrong answer. I also agree that she should not have done what she did.

They both got told it was not appropriate behavior and sent to bed 1/2 hour early. Nothing major at all.

stormabruin's picture

Submitted by stormabruin on Thu, 05/05/2011 - 8:17am

I agree with this. One thing my DH has pounded into SS's brain is that it is not acceptable for him to put his hands on a girl or a woman in anger...ever. Even with BM being the wench she is, DH has told him over & over that as angry as he gets with her, SS is to speak to her & treat her with respect because she is his mother. He has never been allowed to hit or shove SD because she is a girl.

In my opinion, they should both be talked to about what they did wrong & what they should've done differently.

When she put her finger in his face, he should've walked away.

purpledaisies's picture

Submitted by purpledaisies on Thu, 05/05/2011 - 1:15pm

This is what I did and they were real brothers. I made the boy that just touched the other sit for 1 min. of his age and told him to think about what he did then I went and talked to him about it.

The boy that hit I made him write 10 reasons why we do not hit and then talked about every one and and why then I made him put it in his wallet and every time he hit after that I made him get it out and read it and explain it. Yep we had a BIG problem with that one hitting.