I like to thank all the replies and wonderful advices I received on my last post, 30 weeks ago. This is a follow up to that. Here's the link for review: http://www.steptalk.org/node/23219.

In picking up where I last left off... Many things have happened. Both bad and good. Since then, my husband and I did went to see a marriage/family counselor to help mediate our conversations so that nothing is missing between the lines and that accusations and resentment is left out of the discussion. Though, we were only able to attend two sessions before he left for his 4 month army training.

During these sessions we did arrive to a fair agreement that the both girls are not my responsibility. I may obligated to help them and guide them when they cooperate or ask for my help. I did felt a weight lift off my shoulders when my husband reluctantly agreed to this.

So for those four months, the shit hit the fan just on the first month he was gone. My youngest step daughter directed all her anger towards me and her older sister. She would lash out and start yelling at us. Anything we say would be misconstrued or taken as a criticism on her. She even brandished a knife before her older sister and playful threaten her with it. So with being only four months into my pregnancy, I called my husband up and told him point blank I can't deal with her strange/disruptive behavior and ill attitude. He complied with my wish and have her move in with her mom for the duration he was gone.

But then we found out indirectly that she invited her boyfriend over on two different nights and slept with him while my husband was still with us one month prior. The truth didn't come out until she told her mom that she might be pregnant. Fortunately she wasn't. I hope you can understand my shock and feelings of disgust and betrayal regarding her actions. Her anger compounded with what she deemed as being kicked out of the house. She said she disown her father and doesn't even acknowledge our household as her home. Her mother instead of helping her, contributed to her downfall. While at her moms, she experimented with illegal drugs. Her mother would knowingly miss her psychologist appointments and even stop picking up her prescriptions. While there, my youngest step daughter gain over 20 lbs. She also sporadically attended school. Her grades continued to deteriorate.

Also during this time, my oldest step daughter became a really good liar and let the sudden freedom from her father get to her head. I say this because while she may live with me while her father is in training, I was very much absent most of the day. My day consist of waking up at 6 AM, getting myself and son ready for daycare, 9 hour work days and being stuck in traffic for an hour or two back and forth. So essentially, I wouldn't be home until well in the evening. Since she was behind in her education, my husband first enrolled her in home-school. That failed miserably as well. Same issues with self discipline and creating structure I've warned him about. He then signed her up to options, which was a type of program in which a student would attend several hours with a teacher and work on homework packets to earn their high school credits.

Her lack of discipline carried over and she would accomplish the bare minimum to pass by. During the day, she would waste her time by sleeping in, then invite her friends over since their out of school for the summer. Despite my disapproval and constant phone checks, she would assure me that she was doing her school work and was help picking around the house. My lack of trust was warranted since I found little evidence of both and more evidence of her social engagements. I do not know to what extent her freedom allowed her to do while I was gone, but I did gave her more leeway than I should have. Other than that, she was cooperative in helping out when I was home during the evening and weekends.

Four months past easily enough despite the varying stress in being a single mom while pregnant, my husband returned. Things seem back to normal though my youngest step daughter refuse to return home now that her resentment and anger towards our household has reached critical mass. My oldest step daughter was also showing signs of resentment too. Now that her father was home, he rein in the freedom she had during the summer. But despite all this, we manage to fit in a well deserved family vacation and jointly agreed not to invite the youngest step daughter until she rids herself of this anger. Suffice it to say, she never did.

It wasn't until recently she finally apologized for her past behavior and vow to improve her relationships did we welcome her back to our household. I didn't doubt her sincerity, but it is her actions that will convince me whether she truly meant to change and improve her lot.

All seem well, but the latest drama made me realize how truly duped I was by my oldest step daughter. I say this because, just two weeks ago, while the youngest step daughter moved back in, my oldest step daughter demanded that she has a chance to live with her mom. She argued her case convincingly. Her motives seem sincere enough. I even sided with her. I couldn't have been more wrong. Just this morning, I learned from my husband who received a call from the girls mom that my oldest step daughter apparently didn't come home from 'meeting a friend' the other day. It turns out this friend of hers was an 18 year old boy she'd just met. She's only 16. And like that, her mother tracked her down and found her waking up with him. I am totally disillusion by her deception. She took advantage of our trust. She took the previous knowledge of her mother's absent schedule for those two weeks and spoke not a word of it when she proposed to move in with mom. Her mother also enabled her by handling her the keys to her car despite the fact the oldest step daughter doesn't even have a license, let alone a permit.

I'm sorry about the long rant. But it seems despite my husband's and my best intentions for both girls, it seems their determine to self-sabotage while their mother continues to enable them. However, I blame my husband and I for the girls behaviors as well. With a month left to my pregnancy, I can't help but feel that both girls are a threat to my own young and very impressionable boys.

I feel I need to protect them from their sisters destructive behaviors and ill-choices. When is enough is enough? Do I have to divorce my husband in order to divorce from his children? I mean I care for both girls tremendously and want to help them straighten themselves out, yet this is more stress than I can handle. I don't feel like a parent to them anymore, more like a warrant officer out to correct them.

Please advise. Your help was greatly appreciated and help resolve the issues my husband and I have with each other 30 weeks ago. So thank you in advance.