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Childless stepmums

sandy_ts2k's picture

Submitted by sandy_ts2k on Sat, 10/01/2016 - 4:40am

Forums: 
Blended Family Issues

Hello I am new to this forum and wanted to know if there are any stepmums with no children of their own out there? I am 42 years old and recently got married to my now husband who has a 12 years old son. We all have been living together for the last two years.

Now that we are married I have been thinking a lot about children, do I want my own, does my husband want more children etc, I am so confused and time is running out...

I love children, I love my stepson although it hasn't been an easy ride, and there are times I wake up and feel I would love to be a mother, other times I feel happy with my life and the man I love.
We have never discussed this with my husband and if he asked me I wouldn't know what to answer, so I wanted to hear about other women who are in the same situation?

MrsZipper's picture

Submitted by MrsZipper on Sat, 10/01/2016 - 9:11am

It is impossible. And ridiculous that she is asking this question in Blended Families when there is an entire forum on here dedicated to Bio Free Stepmom with the description "This is a forum for any issues or thoughts related to having step kids but no bio kids."

BethAnne's picture

Submitted by BethAnne on Sat, 10/01/2016 - 8:47am

Yep I am in the same boat. Childless stepmom here living full time with my sd9 and contemplating if I want to have kids or not. However I HAVE discussed this extensively with my husband. I would think a more pertinent question to ask yourself first would be why haven't you talked this through with your husband? Why are you holding back on this important discussion that you two should be having together?

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Mon, 10/03/2016 - 1:11am

I think you should talk to your husband about it and not to strangers on the internet...

We can not tell you go ahead time is running out have a baby of your own..... we are not married to you

This should've been resolved before you gotten married, if you talked about it way back and said you do not want to have kids, then got married then you have to stay with that decision, you can't change your mind now. And if you got married without ever talking about it, you are in for a very difficult time

sandy_ts2k's picture

Submitted by sandy_ts2k on Fri, 10/07/2016 - 9:11am

Thank you all for your responses! Writing about it made it real for me and I did speak to my husband. He said that if he had taken the definite decision not to have another child he would have told me long before the wedding otherwise it wouldn't be fair on me. We said that whatever the decision it should be a together decision but if I really want a baby then we should go ahead.. I still don't know whether I want a child or not, but at least we can now openly talk about it instead of me keeping everything inside.