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Birthday parties

Liveyourlife's picture

Submitted by Liveyourlife on Thu, 03/19/2015 - 10:52am

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Blended Family Issues

It's the oldest daughter's 10th birthday, my first birthday as a family member. Her dad discussed having a BBQ at the park, she loved it. Then mom said it's a sleep over at her boyfriend's house. Yes I got an invitation. I always have manners, but I've never actually talked to the woman.

misSTEP's picture

Submitted by misSTEP on Thu, 03/19/2015 - 11:05am

I hate joint parties. Ick. Ick. Ick. Luckily, I never had to deal with it in my step life.

PokaDotty's picture

Submitted by PokaDotty on Thu, 03/19/2015 - 12:11pm

Don't go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Y'all do your thing, BM does her. Otherwise it's a horrible awkward event oozing with fakeness and snubs.

There's plenty of other events that you'll be stuck doing the awkwardness.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Thu, 03/19/2015 - 12:17pm

No, politely decline. You and your BF do your thing for her birthday, let BM do her thing and never the two shall collide.

If you've never talked to the woman, there's no reason to start now. Keep that going as long as you can.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Thu, 03/19/2015 - 4:08pm

Nope. No joint parties. But ... if you are having a joint party it has to be on neutral turf such as a park.

FrustratedSP's picture

Submitted by FrustratedSP on Thu, 04/23/2015 - 2:08pm

I totally agree with no joint parties! I had to go to my SS8 birthday party last year because my spouse was offended that I didn't want to go and support him. I told him I would be uncomfortable, but ultimately decided to go and take my niece and nephew...most uncomfortable 2 hours of my life to date. My spouse's mother wouldn't even come to the party because she can't stand to be around his ex...but I had to go!

I have brought up the subject of having separate birthday parties and he can't figure out how that would work because they invite the kids from school to the party...they can't ask 1/2 to one party and 1/2 to the other...help!!!

momof4AU's picture

Submitted by momof4AU on Thu, 05/07/2015 - 1:11pm

We don't do joint parties either. We did ONE a long time ago, and all it was was a big nightmare. Total excuse for BM to size me up and criticize my every move. Don't do it. Seperate parties are good. Kids seem to like having more than one party anyway.